Why Can't I Have You?
by Nikikiat
Summary: AU Zexion and Demyx go to high school together and barely know of each other’s existences. A few fateful events, however, bring them together. What will become of the pair? Yaoiness...Zemyx
1. Kick the Bucket

Why Can't I Have You

Why Can't I Have You?

By. Nikikiat

Hello, everybody! Ever since I played Kingdom Hearts: chain of Memories and KHII: Final Mix+...I've wondered why everyone insists on writing fanfics where Zexion is a quiet, emo bookworm. So I decided to clear all that up by writing an AU fanfic. Don't ask when it'll end….I suck at stopping when I get good ideas. Just thank the interweb that I've given up on writing it in notebooks first.

Disclaimer: If Kingdom Hearts magically belonged to me, why would I write fanfics about it?

AUZexion and Demyx go to high school together and barely know of each other's existences. A few fateful events, however, bring them together. What will become of the pair?

Warnings? Yes. Yaoiness (possible lemon if I can muster the power to write one), probable rape, angsting…..lots of angsting. Kind of.

Also, prepare to learn about dissecting cats from someone with experience. I will have a dictionary for those of you un-rehearsed in the language of science studies at the end.

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Chapter 1- When Hell Freezes Over

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"Sora, please. Just work with me on this." Zexion stood over his lab partner, holding a scalpel. He actually looked quite menacing. The brunette simply looked up to him and sighed.

"Zex, I don't know how in the heck you dissect anything. Let alone cats." He made an exaggerated gagging motion. "Besides…The smell of that formaldehyde is giving me a wicked headache. I feel really lightheaded. Plus my eyes burn, ya know?" Sora put a hand to his forehead, continuing to gaze at the cobalt-haired teen. Zexion rolled his eyes.

"I'll show you how. Also, getting lightheaded from the smell isn't half as bad as it could be. Apparently your friend Riku got it in his mouth once." He attempted lifting the shorter teen by his arm, only to find Sora limp. Zexion waved a hand in front of the brunette's face. "Sora?" The boy's eyes were closed and his breathing seemed labored. "Sora!" His shout caught the teacher's attention.

"Gentlemen? What's going on over there?"

"It's Sora, sir!" Zexion answered his tall, dark-haired sensei. "I can't figure out what's wrong with him." The teacher got up and walked to where the teen held his seemingly unconscious friend.

"What happened?" He asked gazing at the brunette. The silverette shook his head.

"He was complaining of lightheadedness, and a headache, then he just went out like a light. What do you think we should do, Mr. Valentine?"(Cha, I know. Vincent wasn't in Kingdom Hearts.) The tall man looked around the class.

"I haven't seen something like this in a couple of days, but I would say that Sora probably experienced a chemical imbalance within his brain due to the amount of methanol-like fumes caused by the H2CO. Seeing as none of the people in this room are capable of methanogenesis, the best I can suggest for him is to take him to the nurse's office for a bit to breathe some clean air. If he isn't better in about ten minutes, ask Ms. Coeller if she has any experience in Oncology…Because he might develop some serious problems if this happened so quickly." The teacher explained.

Zexion's eyes widened. Sora could _not _get cancer. The brunette was one of his closest friends, and his lab partner. He nodded to his sensei and quickly dragged Sora out of the room. The hall seemed eerily long due to how much worry Zexion had in his heart at that moment. Cancer caused by dissecting cats was not how anyone wanted to die, and Zexion was scared half to death that his friend was, in fact, going to die. He would have even preferred the world have the T-virus than have his bright-eyed friend diagnosed with something that terrible. The moment he walked through the door of the nurse's office, he was on the ground begging Ms. Coeller to figure out what was wrong with his friend. Though she assured him the teen would be just fine, he still couldn't help but sit shivering at the thought of what might happen. He sat on one of the uncomfortable patient beds in the office, shivering. He started thinking that it was a good idea to be away from the formaldehyde fumes, along with his friend. They had already gone to his head and filled it with stupid ideas.

"Er…what are you doing?" a voice from behind him made him jump. There was a person in the bed across from his. He looked kind of familiar.

"I'm sitting. Anyways, who are you?" Zexion answered. "I think I recognize you." The blond in the opposite bed had a grin on his face.

"I'm Demyx. I sit right behind you in French class." The blond, Demyx, seemed very happy the Zexion was even acknowledging his existence. "You're Zexion, right? What's up that you're in here?"

"I could ask you the same myself. So, I will. What are you doing in here? You look fine to me." The silverette challenged. Demyx grinned.

"A few periods ago I passed out. You kind of smell like formaldehyde, so I'm guessing you're here because of Anatomy, too." He explained. Zexion looked away for a moment, then glanced back with a worried look.

"My friend, Sora…He passed out also. Mr. Valentine scared to crap outta me when he explained that Sora might get cancer from the methanogens in the air from the formaldehyde." He told his new acquaintance. "I kind of panicked, you know? I don't really have that many friends, but….Death really scares me." He forced a smile. "I figured it was better for me if I stayed away from the Anatomy room, too, so I could clear my head." The blond blinked a few times. "What?"

"And here I was, all this time," The blond said airily, "thinking you were an emo kid." That wasn't the first time Zexion had heard of his apparent "emo" style, but it sounded funny coming from Demyx. He couldn't help but chuckle.

"How can I be an emo kid if I just became friends with you?" Suddenly Zexion stopped. Was Demyx his friend? Or was this just one of those flukes where they would talk once, then ignore each other for the rest of their high school lives? He glanced back at where the blond had been, only to find he wasn't there anymore. Without warning, he was tackled to the ground from behind with a hug.

"I don't know, Zexion!" It was Demyx? Zexion felt himself begin to blush. This was his first glomp….And it was from a man. "Let's be best friends, okay!?" The blond was loud, and excited. Zexion grinned, trying in vain to shove his new friend off. Unfortunately, Demyx had arms like a C-clamp. He wasn't planning on letting go any time soon. The cobalt-haired teen settled for standing the best he could. It had been about ten minutes. Hopefully Sora had recovered a bit by now.

"Come on, I guess, Demyx." He told the blond. "We gotta go check on Sora." Demyx just continued smiling and hugging Zexion, so he started to walk to Ms Coeller's desk.

"Zexion, dear, Sora is over there. Try and wake him if you can." She pointed to a bed farther down the rows. "If he won't wake up, you can go back to class, for now." She glared at him. No wait, she was glaring at Demyx. "You, young man, need to go back to class. Now." Demyx giggled, letting go of the taller boy.

"I'll see you later, Zexy!" He exclaimed, cheerfully dancing out of the office. Zexion sighed. The blond was so happy…It felt like a weight of gloom came over the entire world, all of a sudden. He walked over to where Sora laid. Sleeping and, possibly, inflicted with an incurable disease. He shook the brunette lightly, earning a whimper. The cobalt-haired teen raised an eyebrow, shaking Sora harder,

"So-ra?" he dragged out the name as if he were calling a dog. "Wake up, would you?" The brunette grunted. Suddenly he jumped up a grasped Zexion's shoulders, making him jump.

"BOO!" he exclaimed, pretending to be spooky. The silverette slapped Sora's hand off, scowling.

"Dude, when you passed out, you scared the shit outta me." He scolded, "Valentine ended up spooking me with tales of formaldehyde cancer." Sora smirked.

"I knew you were a freak when it came to dying, but that's kind of sad, Zex." He told his friend. "I wasn't in there long enough to grow cancer cells in my brain or something. I feel fine." Zexion looked away, pushing some of his hair away from his eye.

"Yeah…I know." He looked back, "But you also know that life would suck without you in it. How else would I get a hold of my Skittles?" Sora giggled.

"You'd have to actually buy them for once…" he poked Zexion's arm. "Come on, we should go back to class. I'm sure that, by now, Kairi's going insane from trying to bribe Valentine to figure out what's wrong with me." He stood up, grabbing his friend's shoulder. "We don't want Vincent failing her, now, do we?" he asked. The cobalt-haired boy cocked his head to the side.

"Vincent?" he inquired. Sora nodded.

"Mr. Valentine's first name."

"Oh…" he quickly added, "And yes, I do want Kairi to fail. She keeps trying to break you and Riku up. She deserves it."

"She does, doesn't she?"

Zexion didn't even realize he'd forgotten to tell his best friend about his new blond acquaintance.

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DICTIONARY FOR THOSE UNVERSED IN ZEXION LANGUAGE:

H2CO- The term for the chemical compound of Formaldehyde.

Methanogenesis-Also called biomethanation, is the formation of methane by microbes known as methanogens. Organisms capable of producing methane.

Oncology- Study for the prevention of Cancer.

C-clamp- A tool used by builders when holding multiple pieces of wood together, or when two objects must be pushed together with great force. It gains its name from the shape it holds: a capital C.

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Oh my gosh, I'm a nerd.

I'll post another chapter soon, but if you guys don't show love by reviewing and giving me ideas and stuff, I'll discontinue it.

Haha. You have no choice. If you love it, review. If you hate it, review.

I can make it better. That way you won't have an excuse to hate it.

Just show love or you won't get any new chapters for a long time.


	2. I'm Your Problem Now

Welcome back

Welcome back.

Chapter two….I'm so proud of anyone who reads this far! It's magical to know that I must have at least one fan.

Disclaimer: Still stands.

This chapter? Read it. I will forever continue to name the chapters after my favorite songs. Try and find out who sang them…If you do, you get a cookie…or an OC…

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Chapter 2- I'm Your Problem Now

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"Zexion? Hey…Zexy?" Only after Demyx waved a hand in front of his face did he realize that the blond was trying to get his attention. French class was so today since they had a substitute, and Demyx still _seemed _to be his friend. Zexion was glad. But, on the other hand, he wasn't sure if all the hugs and kindness he received from the man were entirely plutonic. Actually, he knew almost nothing about the blond.

"Yeah? What's up Dem?" He smiled gently at his new friend. Demyx seemed to have a permanent smile on his face.

"How was Sora, yesterday? I haven't gotten a chance to ask." He put his hand on Zexion chair. "I kind of know his boyfriend, so I want to know." The silverette nodded.

"Sora was okay. His mom is taking him to a doctor today to get a CAT scan. Just in case, well…You know." He told the blond. Even if he couldn't see Demyx, he knew that he was nodding also. He let go of the teen's chair and leaned back in his own. Zexion felt a strange rush of emotion when Demyx moved farther away. The cobalt-haired boy couldn't place the feeling, but it was like he was emptier somehow. It was weird enough that he already felt like he'd known the blond forever, after only having learned of his existence the day earlier. As the substitute continued to drone on things they had learned years ago, Zexion pondered why he felt what he did when the shorter teen was around him. He looked toward the ceiling. Maybe it was his hair…He decided. Never in his life had he ever met someone with a mullet. Perhaps it was because of the fact that he was attracted to strange things. Demyx fell directly into _that _category. No one he'd ever known had pretended to be sick in Anatomy. Sora's was definitely for real. He leaned back against his own chair, only to find warm arms wrap around his neck. Demyx was hugging him. Again. _That kid just loves hu—_his thoughts were interrupted when he felt the blond's hot breaths on his face. Zexion's eye twitched.

"Zexion…?" Demyx whispered in a, somehow, loving voice. The taller teen didn't know what to make of this sudden PDA in class.

"Ye-yes?" he managed to stammer in reply. Did this even fall into the category of purely plutonic anymore?

"Do you like me?" the blond asked. Zexion wasn't sure what in the world to answer to a question like that. _Do you like me?_ What kind of person asked that? He kicked himself inwardly. _Demyx would, dummy._ He decided to play it by ear.

"As a friend….I guess. Why?"

"No reason…But…um...Will you please stay with me forever?" Zexion's eyes widened. Why was someone he just met asking such weird things? He pulled at Demyx's arms.

"Demyx…Can we please discuss this later…? Possibly in a more private place?" he hissed quietly. Suddenly the arms were gone. Demyx made a little noise in his throat, then sat back in his own chair, again. Once again, Zexion felt a strange empty feeling. What was Demyx trying to do? He blushed silently. Was the blond…Did he have feelings for the quiet teen? For the rest of the period, he decided to focus on the lesson.

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Lunch

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"So…Uh…Zexy…Will you answer me now?" The pair sat at one of the lunch tables at the farthest side of the room. Sora, Riku, and a few of Zexion's friends were still getting their lunches, so they had some time alone. Together.

"Umm…Can you ask the question again?" the silverette pleaded, hoping to gain some extra procrastination to think of an answer. The blond grabbed his hand suddenly.

"Will you stay with me forever? Please, Zexy?" he repeated the question, making Zexion blush once more. He looked down at the table. Demyx was seriously serious about this. _He's even holding my hand…_He thought anxiously. He met Demyx's gaze. The blond's eyes were so green…And he certainly didn't _dislike _the teen. He sighed.

"Yeah…I guess so…" he answered reluctantly. Demyx's grin returned, back to its rightful place.

"Thank you so much, Zexy!" he exclaimed, hugging the man from across the table. "From now on you're my bestest friend in the world!" Zexion shook his head suddenly.

"Wait, wait, waaaiit!" he cried out. "Didn't you, like, just ask me out or something?" Demyx stared at him with a puzzled gaze.

"What are you talking about? I just asked if you'd stay with me forever. You know?" Zexion's expression told him otherwise. "Best friends? BFFs? Jeez...It's all girls talk about these days…" the blond seemed kind of angry. The taller boy felt a surge of relief when Sora suddenly sat down beside him with Riku and a tray of food. Zexion's thoughts quickly jumped to the couple. How _did _Sora and Riku get together? Why was it that Kairi was such a bitch about them being a couple?

More importantly, would whatever happened to them happen to him and Demyx?

He started to blush again, while he took small bites of his own food. Sora had kicked up a small conversation with his new blond friend, and eventually Zexion's other friends, Axel and Fuu, joined them at their corner table. The cobalt-haired teen kept going back to thoughts of his friend's relationships. They _all _had boyfriends. Even Axel…And he was manly. He rubbed his temples. _Why in the hell am I even thinking about this? _He asked himself. _It's not like I was all…Wanting to have a boyfriend or something. _He growled at himself, earning a startled glance from Sora who was trying to swipe some of Demyx's fries.

"Zex," Riku was talking now, "What is with you? Usually you're even more social than Sora is…Is something wrong?" Zexion's blush returned. It's not like he could just say that he was thinking about getting a boyfriend…Especially in front of Demyx. It was all too embarrassing.

"Uh-umm…Well, I was just thinking really hard. It's nothing…Just some math problems that I was having trouble with…" The teen slapped himself internally. What was he thinking? Someone was going to ask him what math problem, and then he wouldn't have an excuse, and it would go on and on…He didn't even like Demyx…Did he?

"Well…If you say so…" Riku gave him a puzzled look, then went back to talking with Sora and making bets with Fuu. He looked away from all of them. _I don't like Demyx, I'm definitely not gay, and I have good friends…What am I worried about?_ When he looked up he was greeted by the blond's eyes. He was really close.

"D-Demyx?" Zexion couldn't seem to break himself of the habit of stammering. "What? What is it?" The shorter teen wasn't smiling, so there was probably something wrong.

"Zexion…Are you angry at me for asking you to be my best friend?" his eyes seemed sad. The cobalt-haired boy shook his head vigorously.

"Of course not!" he exclaimed. "I'm just…Not all that great with weird thoughts about math like the ones I'm having right now." Demyx eyed him curiously.

"Riiight….'Math' thoughts." He said wryly, "You don't have to lie to me. I know what you're thinking." Zexion's eyes widened again.

"Y-you do?" This was bad. If Demyx knew what he was thinking, how anyone else miss it?

"You're thinking about a pretty girl aren't you?" He pretended to be sly. "Tell me who she is! I promise I won't tell anyone…" Zexion sighed in relief. Demyx was oblivious…That was actually good for once.

"I can't tell you…It'd be way to embarrassing." He told the blond. The teen's grin returned.

"That's okay, but just as long as it's not Mirai…." He leaned in again. "She's mine." The silverette looked away suddenly. _OF COURSE! He has a girlfriend._ Demyx watched him with a worried expression. "Zexy? Are you okay? Are you overwhelmed by shock that I have a girlfriend?" Zexion shook his head.

"It's nothing….And who do you mean by Mirai? You mean Yuno Mirai?" Zexion's voice was quivering. He didn't understand…Why did it hurt so much to hear that Demyx had someone? The blond nodded to his question.

"I'll introduce you to her sometime. I actually abandoned my usual table to sit with you today…" Zexion nodded in answer, choosing to remain silent as Demyx watched him. _Goddamn my attraction for internal conflict!!_ He thought angrily to himself. "Zexy, are you always like this? Or is it just me?" Axel leaned over the blond.

"I think it's just you, delicate boy." He rubbed Demyx's head. "Just give him time. He has these things he likes to call 'internal conflicts' and he has 'um for all his new friends. Usually, if you can last through it, you guys will be like this by the end." He intertwined his own hands together to show how close the two would be. Zexion felt…He just felt. He didn't know what he was feeling, or how to explain his feelings. It was all Demyx's fault, but he didn't want to blame the guy for all his problems.

So Zexion continued having his issues until the bell signaled the end of lunch. By the end, he felt like he hadn't gotten anywhere yet.

…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..…..

How did you guys like it? You actually made it to the end is what surprises me. Usually people hate my fics and just drop um without even poppin' a review. And about the things with the chapter names…I can only give one hint. One of the artist's albums is about Frankenstein girls. Do tell me what you think.


	3. Royally screwed

Hi

Hi.

Welcome to chapter 3.

No, I didn't write it anywhere near Valentine's Day. This chapter was in honor of my first day of school. Sadly, Zexy is becoming more and more emo…but he isn't really emo. That's just _my _personality.

My disclaimer still stands. And we will get to attack Zexy with glomps…for now.

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Royally Fucked

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Two weeks. They'd been friends for two whole weeks, and Zexion _still _had that strange feeling eating away at him. Whenever he looked at the blond he felt like he was going to explode. He really wanted to ask someone what was wrong with him…But seriously. Who wouldn't laugh at him? If he asked Riku, the guy would probably laugh harder than he does at Sora's funny faces. If he asked Axel, the red-head would probably tell the whole world. Fuu wouldn't help at all if he asked her…And Sora most likely didn't know a thing about his feelings. Currently, he was sitting in English class having something on the verge of a panic attack. Valentine's day was in a week, and he had the urge to use all his money on Demyx. _What am I? A girl?! _People kept looking over at him and staring at him. He tried his hardest to keep calm, but he needed answers. He wasn't sure if he could trust the people he knew…Except for Sora. But, Sora was like a little kid. This was even more confusing than the first time he saw a porno. Really, really, insanely confusing.

Sora was the _only _one he _could _ask, though. Zexion waited patiently in his desk as the English teacher droned on about proverbs, and how everyone wrote stories with too little of them.

"Zexion?" Zexion twitched as the teacher called on him.

"Er….Yes , Mr. Strife?" he replied, not knowing what else to say. The spiky-haired teacher glared at him.

"Would you care to answer the question?"

"What question?" Zexion felt dumb. He had never failed to answer a question, save when he was young. The teacher turned to the class.

"This is an example of what happens when you are over-run by the teenage flow of hormones. You are unable to pay attention when a distraction is present. Whether it be a girl, or a boy…Never, ever do what this young man just did." He announced. "Zexion, for not paying attention, I would like to see you at the front of the room after class." A few of the girls in the class giggled. Zexion turned bright red and stared down at his desk. This was turning out to be the worst month of his life. February definitely was not agreeable for the confused.

When the bell finally rang- forever after- Zexion reported to the teacher, as ordered. He couldn't afford to get into anymore trouble by just leaving. The tall, blond adult looked down at him, shaking his head.

"What's going on with you, Zex? You're usually my best student." He seemed genuinely caring. "I know the IB(yes, I'll explain this at the end) program can be tough on your social life, but you can't just not pay attention." The cobalt-haired teen glanced at his teacher's face.

"I'm really sorry, Mr. Strife….It's just that I'm under a lot of stress right now. All my friends have dates and stuff…And I don't want to be alone on Singles Awareness Day again." He attempted in an excuse. Sighing, his English teacher put a hand on Zexion's shoulder.

"Worry less about dates and more about school. I know you're a Junior and all, but believe me….You'll have more time in college and your adulthood to find someone you really like." He glanced around the room. "It's not that I'm telling you not to have crushes or girlfriends or anything, it's just…You should worry about it less. You already worry enough. I wouldn't be surprised if you start getting ulcers all the time." The teen looked away. Even his favorite teacher didn't understand. That was obviously saying something about the situation.

"I'm sorry, sir. It's just that I'm really confused right now."

"Jeez…Zexion how many times do I have to tell you that you can call me Cloud when we aren't in class?"

"I…I don't know…I'm just not used to it." The teen explained. His teacher, Cloud, smirked.

"You aren't in trouble. Just get your act back together, okay?" Zexion nodded. "Go on, you. Enjoy your lunch."

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Lunch

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"This is my girlfriend, Mirai!" Demyx exclaimed, holding a girl out in front of him. Zexion looked her over. She was about 5'6" and had shortish black hair, and almost violet eyes. She was wearing a black and pink striped, short jacket over a black shirt, and she had a small black mini-skirt with pink-black knee socks. He would have thought she was cute, if it hadn't been for the fact that she was the cause of the strange feelings the teen was having. Mirai seemed to enjoy the expression on Zexion's face, because her grin almost matched the blond's.

"Nice to meet you, Mr. Zexy!" she said, practically glomping him. Zexion, unfortunately, couldn't move his arms due to the fact that they were being crushed under hers.

"Nice to meet you, too, Mirai." Zexion managed a smile. "Demyx told me a lot about you. I've been looking forward to actually talking to you." This seemed to please her enough that she released him, turning to her boyfriend.

"He's so _pretty, _Dem! I can't believe he doesn't have a girlfriend!" she exclaimed. Zexion turned red, yet again.

"Hey!" he called, pretending to be offended, "If I wanted a girlfriend I could get one!" The girl turned back to him.

"I'm sure you could! Girls really like emo kids these days."

"I am _NOT _emo! It just so happens that I like my hair this way!" He was actually starting to enjoy the conversation. It was almost like the first time he'd talked to Demyx.

"Then why do you wear long sleeves all the time? Aren't they to hide your cuts?"

"I don't look good in short sleeves! It may seem unbelievable, but I do care about the way I look!" he touched his hair, "Besides….I feel like a rabbit." Mirai smirked at him.

"Yeah…A rabbit with bear-poo on it!"

"I have a feeling you two are gonna be good friends, huh?" Demyx interjected hopefully. Zexion glanced at his friend, nodding. Mirai settled for glomping the blond…Making the cobalt-haired teen feel very uncomfortable.

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That Night….

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Zexion lay awake staring at his ceiling. He glanced at the alarm clock at the head of his bed.

8:17 P.M.

It was barely time for primetime anime on TV, which meant everyone in Sora's family was still awake. Zexion, himself, had uncaring parents. His father worked in another state, and his mother usually spent her time in her room reading books by strange authors. The first floor of his house was practically a jungle of his mother's books, so he sometimes grabbed them as he left for school in the morning. It didn't take more than two days to finish most of them, but a lot of them were very interesting.

Zexion stared at the phone he held in his hand. Now was his moment of truth. He could finally ask Sora what was wrong with him. He dialed the number, and slowly put the phone up to his ear.

"Hello?" Sora's mom had answered. Zexion sighed.

"Hi…Um, is Sora awake?" He heard a pause followed by the muffled sound of his friend's mother calling something. There were a few clicks, and the sound of walking.

"Hey?" The brunette's voice sounded strange over the phone, as it always did.

"Hey, Sora…I was kinda wondering if I could ask you a question?"

"I thought you did your homework at night…"

"I do. I just didn't have much tonight, and I really need to ask you a question." There was a long pause. "Sora?"

"Ask me whatever, Zex…Just don't expect the right answer." Zexion nodded, though he knew his friend couldn't see.

"Well…Sora…What do you think of Demyx?" He heard a chuckle on the opposite line.

"I guess he's a pretty cool guy…Why?" Zexion took a deep breath.

"Well…Ya, know….I've been having these weird thoughts lately…Like, whenever he's around I feel really strange inside…And I don't really trust talking to anyone but you about this…." There was another long pause.

"Tell me more about these weird feelings….Do you feel weird whenever Mirai is with him?" Zexion swallowed.

"Yeah…I feel like there's a lump in my throat, you know, like when you cry…But it only happens when he's with her. Also, when he isn't hanging out with us, I feel kind of empty…" Pause.

"Zexion…Do you swear not to take anything I tell you the wrong way?" Zexion wasn't sure what _that _meant, but he figured it couldn't be bad.

"Yeah, sure…" Another pause.

"You swear?"

"Yes!" The silverette was starting to get impatient. Nothing Sora could tell him could be so bad that he could take it the wrong way…Could it?

"Okay…" Sora paused once more, and Zexion heard him sigh heavily. "Zexion…I think you're in love with Demyx. I mean cuz…that's the way I felt when I first learned I had feelings for Ri—"

"NO!!" Zexion shouted as quietly as he could. "I AM SO NOT IN LOVE WITH THAT GUY!!" Although that would explain the feelings, how _could _he possibly be in love with someone and not know it?

"I'm just saying that's the way I felt before I knew I was in love with Riku…Plus, you swore you wouldn't take that t he wrong way."

"There is no wrong way to take that, Sora. You basically said flat out that I'm gay." Sora paused, yet again.

"Look. I have to let you go, but honestly, you have to learn to accept it. Demyx and you would probably make a good couple. It just sucks for you that he's got a girlfriend."

"I'm sorry, Sora…Bye…"

"Bye…" There was a click followed by a series of beeps that slowly got faster. Zexion clicked off the phone and plugged it into it's charger. _Can it really be true? _He thought sadly. _Could I be in love with Demyx?_ He touched his forehead to make sure he wasn't going delirious from some fever, then returned his gaze to the ceiling.

"I love you, Demyx…." The words felt foreign, but his heart wasn't telling him that what he was feeling was wrong. "I love you…" He tested the words again, and again. Eventually, he fell into the darkness of his dreams…with nothing but hope that he would wake up to find he had been in a coma for the past year.

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IB- International Baccalaurate Program. Also called the Middle Years Program , or Diploma Program, IB is for the educationally advance students who require more of a challenge in their everyday classes. By taking the IB program, students are also given the opportunity to go to virtually any college they desire.

Singles Awareness Day- Another name for Valentine's Day, just like St.Xcotyl's Day.

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Yes. Zexion is insanely smart.

Now that he's figured out something new, do you think I should keep pushing him? Or do you think he can figure it out on his own? I vote he figures it out…but then my story would just end right here. Guess I have to help him out.

Review please?

Please?


	4. Played

CHA

CHA!

Chapter 4 means more plotline.

Raise your hand if you're excited for this fanfic… (A few people randomly raise their hands) YEAH!

Okay…Anybody guessed who sings my chapter names yet? It's all on the same album…

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Played

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"Zexy? Hey? What's up?" Demyx was poking the back of his head in an annoying, but loveable fashion. It was three days to Valentine's…That's what. Zexion shrugged.

"It's nothing. Just thinking about stuff…" he answered, avoiding the question.

"What kinda stuff?"

"Weird stuff."

"Weird how?"

"Dem, please. You're gonna see soon. I promise." The blond stopped poking his head.

"But I don't wanna wait." Zexion imagined him pouting. He chuckled softly. Demyx never ceased to put him in a good mood.

"You'll see. Don't worry…" He quickly silenced himself when the French teacher glared directly at both of them. From what the silverette knew, the teacher, Mr. Leonhart, had a very close relationship with Cloud. He wondered why the guy hated him so much. Zexion assumed it was because he was so quiet and barely spoke up when they were learning new phrases. Seeing as this was a normal level class, though, he didn't understand why he was being pushed so hard. As soon as Mr. Leonhart looked away from the pair, Zexion began doodling a small message on his notes. He quickly, and quietly, tore off the corner of the paper, folded it, and threw it backward into Demyx's lap. He heard a breathy giggle, followed by the scratching of a pencil. The note flew back onto the teen's desk. He opened it, read it, and replied. They continued the process until the small piece of paper was filled….

_**Hey, Dem…Why do you like Mirai so much?**_

_**Well, that's a dumb question. She's awesome.**_

_**I know, I know…but I was kind of wondering why you asked that question.**_

_**What question?**_

_**Whether I liked you or not.**_

_**Well…Can we talk about that later?**_

_**Sure…But, still…**_

_**Still what?**_

_**What do you want for Valentines?**_

**A PUPPY!**

Zexion held the note in a fist, slowly crumpling it and sticking it in his pocket. Neither of them could afford Leonhart figuring out they'd been passing notes. He smiled down at his notebook. He was still coming to copes with what Sora had told him the week before. Sora had kept quiet about their conversation, but every once in a while the brunette gave him a look that almost scared him. It was pleading. Zexion just wanted to tell him that, yes, he did love the blond. Even _he _couldn't avoid the truth for that long. Sadly, Zexion still couldn't bring himself to tell the rest of the world yet. So he sat, smiling, for the rest of class, imagining what kind of dog Demyx could possibly take care of.

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Lunch…Again.

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Demyx and Zexion's group of friends had officially merged with each other. Sora had made friends with a few of the new people, like the pink-haired Marluxia…And Axel officially got to hang out with his boyfriend all the time. Fuu had broken away and joined with the tough group. Fuu kept claiming that she and Zexion were still friends, and that she just didn't want to be around Kairi--Riku and Sora's friend-- all the time. The silver-haired girl assured him that if the red-head left the table, she would hang out with him again. Demyx spent most of his time eating across from Zexion with Mirai. It didn't take long for them to become close.

"Hey Zexy…" Mirai greeted him as he sat in his regular place on the opposite side of her. "You seen Dem? He was acting all…weird-like this morning…" The silverette gave her a puzzled look, shaking his head.

"I haven't seen him since fourth period." He explained. She sighed, nodding. Suddenly, her spirits lifted as if she'd just seen someone in the clouds…

"Demyx!" she called loud enough that he could hear her from across the room. She waved both of her arms frantically. Zexion stared at her.

"Are you having a seizure…? Or did you forget to take your Ritalin today?" Mirai stopped waving at her boyfriend for a moment to glare at him.

"You know I don't take meds!" she stuck her tongue out at him. The silverette felt the, now familiar, arms of his friend wind around his neck from behind.

"Hey…Can I steal Zexy away for a bit?" Demyx sounded…less happy than usual. Mirai nodded. It seemed she was just happy to see the guy. Zexion knew there must've been something wrong, though. The bounce in the blonde's voice was eerily missing. As he was dragged away from the table backwards, her noticed Mirai get a very surprised look on her face…Then she took on a very depressed expression.

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The Hall (unnecessary, I know)

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Demyx stared into Zexion's eyes unhappily. The cobalt-haired teen didn't understand. Then again, he never seemed to understand what Demyx was feeling. The blond was frowning. A lot.

"Zexion…I figured I should tell you why I asked you if you liked me…" his voice…It was pure. Unadulterated with his usual happiness. It was almost magical.

"Demyx…you don't have to if it hurts to talk about…" Zexion _did _want to know about this, but he didn't want to push the person he now knew he loved. The blond shook his head.

"No…I have to tell you…You're my best friend…" he was almost shaking. The silverette was concerned now…Was his friend's childhood really _that_ terrible, or something? "My…Mom wasn't a good person…She's kinda in prison right now…" he looked down. "And my dad…My dad is always gone. He has five jobs…I never get to see him…" _Demyx has abandonment issues…_Zexion concluded from what the blond had told him. "Don't be mad if I sounded weird…." The cobalt-haired teen shook his head, holding out his arms.

"I could never hate you, Dem…Want a hug?" Demyx stared at his friend for a moment, then walked into his arms, hugging him back tightly. "It's okay…really…I'm not planning on leaving any time soon." _I love you…_

"Zexy…Could you possibly get any _more _sappy?" the blond murmured from his chest. "I mean come on…What are you?" He looked into his friend's eyes. "A girl?" Zexion laughed.

"Let's go back to lunch…Mirai is probably destroying the lunch room by now…" Demyx nodded, letting go of the silverette. "By the way…When's your birthday?" The blond glanced at him, then at the ceiling.

"Er…First, when's yours? You've already implied getting me something for Valentine's." Zexion grinned.

"Of course I'm getting you something for Valentine's…Will you be my Valentine Demyx?" He put on a pout, interlacing his hands near his face. The blond smirked, but nodded. "My birthday is February 28th, Okay?" They walked into the lunch room, both grinning, toward the table they shared at the end of the room. Mirai, looking rather shocked that both were in such good moods, threw a French Fri at Zexion's head.

"How dare _you _get him in a good mood without my help?" She was pouting like a little kid…On the other hand, she always did that. The two sat down, and talked like they normally did. Zexion was more than grateful that all awkwardness that had once existed, no longer did.

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Later On….

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Zexion stood at the window of a pet store debating whether what Demyx had said about a puppy was joke, or if he was serious. The least expensive puppies were usually mix breeds, but the silverette didn't know much about dogs. If a bunch of cool dogs were all mixed together…Shouldn't that make the best dog in the world? He sighed, and walked into the store. Even if Demyx didn't want one, it was the thought that counted. The store was playing really old music on the radio, and no one was at the front desk. Zexion was relieved to hear a little bell ring when he closed the door. That way the animals couldn't get stolen and placed into the hands of bad owners. Then it suddenly occurred to him that Demyx hadn't told the silverette his birthday. He thought on this as he browsed through the animals. Zexion preferred cats, and there were a lot of adorable kittens there, but if Demyx said puppy, he was going to get the blond a puppy. Then a little white creature caught his eye. It was a tiny, albino husky. The blue-eyed teen hadn't realized anything as pretty as this dog existed. It was kind of expensive, though. 1,000 munny was just a teency bit more than he had with him. But he _needed _this dog for Demyx. The rang the bell multiple times at the front desk, and soon a really tall blond woman walked out of the room behind it. Her name tag read Larxene.

"May I help you?" she asked impatiently. Zexion looked into her eyes.

"How much would it cost for you to hold a dog here till I can go home and get enough money for it?" he asked in an almost loud voice. She blinked a couple of times.

"That depends…Which dog would we be holding for you?"

"The albino husky puppy in the back of the shop. The one that costs 1,000 munny." He explained. Larxene nodded.

"I'm not sure how many people are going to want that specific dog, seeing as most don't go past the front of the shop, but, I can hold it here for you for the rest of the day if you give us 300 munny now. Call it a holding cost." She told him. Zexion smiled, pulling munny excitedly out of his wallet. She took it, opening a cash register behind the desk. "How old are you, anyway?" she asked. Zexion was confused for a moment, then noticed that he was behaving like a child. He sighed.

"I'm ashamed to say that I'm 17. Honestly…I don't usually act _that_ immature…Seriously." He turned around, and walked toward the door. "It's till the end of the day?" Larxene sighed.

"Just go, kid. He'll still be here when you get back. I promise."

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Leonhart is actually Leon(aka Squall)'s real last name. He and Cloud are lovers.

English and French were the only classes I could think of…

But summer is almost over and those are my favorite classes.

Will Zexion be able to win Demyx's heart with a puppy?

I'll tell you right now, you might be disappointed.


	5. What Do They Know?

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Yay. Sorry…Emo mood again….I might have to go to England next summer. This means less Fanfic-ing.

At least I can meet my transsexual, gay friend who lives in that general area.

Hopefully, by next year, this fic will be somewhere near the end.

If not, I must have magical powers.

I've officially changed the album, but chapter names are still by the same artist.

Guess who? Please?

Also, this fic is _not _going where you think it is. It'll be way more difficult.

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What Do _They _Know?

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When Zexion walked through the door of his house, he was greeted by his mother…Which was extremely unusual. He eyed her curiously.

"Mom…What's up?" his voice returned to its accustomed maturity. Her eyes seemed to go straight through him.

"Zexion where were you?"

"I was in town mom…I came home to get some munny from my room." He told her. Her mouth opened, then closed.

"Why weren't you here?" her voice was airy. He shook his head.

"Look mom…I don't have time for this. Can we talk about this later?"

"But, later I won't remember…." Her silvery-hair flayed out in several directions. Zexion was confused at what was wrong with his mother, but at the same time, all he wanted was that dog.

"Mom…If it's so unimportant that you would forget it later, let's just not discuss it at all." With that, he ascended the stairs to his room to retrieve what he needed. He left his mother all alone in the empty house, unsure if she was going to be alright.

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The Pet Store of Wonderful Furry Friends…..(lol)

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"Calm down…He's still here." Larxene, the pet shop employee, soothed as Zexion burst into the small building. "You really want this dog, don't you?" The teen couldn't help but nod slowly.

"I can't really explain it…but it has to be him..." He told her as she lifted the dog and carried it over to the front desk.

"No, I get it…I was just kind of surprised." She explained to him, "Most people these days prefer cats, because they're quieter and less messy…But I know where you're coming from when you say it has to be him." She pulled a few colored bands of cloth out of a drawer. "He's cute. Anyway, pick a collar. Every pet comes with a free one." The blond woman held out the colored bands.

Pink, blue, green, red, or black.

Zexion pointed to the blue one. Blue with an albino dog just seemed…well, good. The teen gave the older woman the payment for the dog, and quickly paced out of the shop. The sooner he made it back, the sooner he could stop panicking about why in the world he bought the animal in the first place. He needed to talk to Sora…He was the only one who knew, and the silverette needed to get some anger out.

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Back at Zexy's House…

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"SORA! Please, jeezum, I just want to know what you think!" Zexion answered to a cry of delight over the phone. Sora was overcome with happiness that Zexion got a dog. Regardless of the fact that he was giving it away, the brunette begged to come over and see it.

"Zex, dude…You're like the worlds sweetest guy to crush on somebody." Sora giggled. "You fall in love like a little kid! I wish you were _my _boyfriend…"

"Sora!" Zexion whined, "That's just weird…Besides, Riku's a good guy." Sora sighed…but it sounded more like white noise over the phone.

"I really just think you should tell Demyx how you feel. You're like a girl." The brunette told him. "You gossip about him with me and all that, but you treat him like your best friend." There was a pause. "You can't watch the person you love be happy with someone else. Zexion, I know this is really hurting you…and I know you must despise Mirai…You just need to come out and say it." Zexion sighed, in turn, lying back on his headboard.

"How did you and Riku get together?"

"The same way you should get with Dem…Riku was dating Kairi, and I told him how I felt. I'll admit it was really hard, seeing as, at that point, I was the only gay one in our gang."

"But, he loved you back?" the silverette was beginning to think it was all too good to be true.

"It took time, but, yeah…I mean, look at us now…"

"Yeah…You should go to sleep. I'm sure Riku's going to want you rested two days from now…"

"What's two days from now?"

"Just go to sleep, Sora. Think really hard about it until you fall asleep."

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And two days passed in which Sora and Zexion had several conversations that ended up in anger at the brunette. And Zexion's growing jealousy of Mirai continued, each day spent with Demyx seeming to include her.

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School….

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"Happy Valentine's Zexy!!" Demyx glomped the teen, knocking him onto the ground. He handed the silverette a tiny blue box. "Here's your present!" Zexion grinned.

"Dem, you evil, little rabbit-monster!" he accused playfully, "How am I supposed to make you happy if you spend money on me? You didn't have to get me a present…" The blond hugged him.

"Of course I did…You're my best friend…Wait, haven't we had this conversation before?" He poked the silverette's face. "You're like a girl." At that moment, Mirai ran up and jumped on both of them.

"Isn't it, like, illegal to sit in the middle of the hall looking weird?" she asked, turning to Zexion.

"No…" he told her, catching her in a head lock, "But it is illegal for it to be Singles Awareness Day, and you didn't even give any sympathy!!" he began to noogie her head playfully. She pulled her head out of his grasp and shoved him, pouting.

"It's not my fault you don't have a significant other, Zexy…" She smirked at him, "You spend all your time with me and Dem…What are you? In love with him, or something?" Zexion felt like his world had suddenly fallen apart. She thought it was a joke...Someone like Demyx would never like someone like him…Would they? His eye twitched visibly. Demyx waved a hand in front of his face.

"Zexion…It was just a joke. Are you okay? Are you really _that _opposed to being gay, or something?" the blond started babbling to try and make him feel better.

"It's nothing…I have to go talk with Sora…I-I'll see you later…" he stood and quickly walked away from the pair. Since it was about ten minutes before school actually began, Zexion wasn't surprised to find his brunette friend in a corner with Riku… "Celebrating". When Sora caught his gaze, he turned red and quickly stopped his boyfriend.

"Z-zexion…Er…What's up?" Riku stood behind him with is arms around the smaller boy's neck. Zexion stared into the brunette's eyes.

"I'm sorry Riku, but I really need to talk to Sora…Alone..?" he requested. The taller boy shrugged, kissed his boyfriend's cheek, then walked away. Sora watched Riku walk away, then turned to his friend.

"What's wrong..? You look, kinda like shit…" Zexion nodded to his friend's observation.

"I can't do it Sora…I was going to this morning, but…Mirai showed up, and she actually guessed my feelings..." He looked away. "They treated it like some big joke." Sora frowned.

"I'm sorry, Zex…But I have an idea…" he offered. The cobalt-haired teen looked back to his friend, with hope in his eyes. "Invite Demyx over to your house for after school. Seeing as you have to do that anyway to give him the puppy…You can try telling him when you're there. That way Mirai won't be around to say anything stupid." Zexion nodded.

"Thanks, Sora…"

"You really are like a girl, ya know."

"Yeah…I know…."

"Go talk to him now…See you." The brunette made a shooing motion, making Zexion laugh.

"Bye, Sora…" The teen decided that Sora's idea would probably be the best decision anyways. He went back to the blond and his girlfriend, and invited him to come to his house. Zexion was glad that he at least said yes.

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LET IT BE KNOWN THAT THIS IS MY FIRST ZEMYX EVER!

Inspired by thew.israel.project.107.'s story The Unfamiliar.

Best line of all time

"Sure, when you're not singing, chattering inanely, playing your sitar, playing with Zexion's hair, playing with _Roxas' _hair, making up _songs _about Roxas and Zexion's hair – "

YAY!

Okay, I'm done now…

Next chapter will surprise you all….I promise…


	6. Z

Starwars and Jaws

Starwars and Jaws.

Welcome to chapter 6….

It's time for surprises….And five Microsoft Word pages of strange.

It broke my heart to write this at all.

I love you, Demyx….I love you more than Zexy will ever love you!!

Warning for this chapter…Just a warning. I refuse to give away storyline.

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Z

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"Zexy…You have a big house." Demyx stared up at the building. Zexion had managed to brave through the rest of the school day, but he wasn't positive if he could actually tell the blond what he was thinking. He grabbed his friend's arm.

"Come on! I have to give you your gift!" he ran, dragging Demyx, to the fence of his backyard. After opening it, he shoved the blond in first, then followed. Demyx was pink all of a sudden. Literally, and hypothetically. "Meet your new puppy." The dog was running round beneath the blond's legs, begging for love. The green-eyed teen turned to Zexion.

"Zexy, you are officially the best friend I've _ever _had in my life." He kneeled to pick up the dog. "We're going to my house now!" The silverette blinked at him.

"Why?"

"We have to take him home…Plus, I really want someone to keep me company for once. I don't really have many neighbors, so I get lonely."

"Whatever you say, Dem."

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Demyx's House…..?

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"Zexy…what do you think of my room?" The pair was sitting on the blond's bed. Zexion looked around.

"It's really…blue." Suddenly Demyx stood up, clapping his hands.

"Now! I want to show you something." He ran over to a door that looked like a closet, and dug through a stack of things in front of it. When he sat back down next to his friend, he was holding a little velvet box…The kind that people usually kept wedding rings in. The silverette wasn't sure if he was following where the blond was going with all this.

"What's up with the box?"

"It's got a ring in it. And I really want to talk to you about something…" Demyx pleaded. Zexion nodded, kind of glad that he was right about the box containing a ring. The blond flipped it open to reveal a little silver band with greenish rhinestones embedded in the metal.

"Uhh….." was all Zexion could manage at the sight. Demyx chuckled.

"Do you think Mirai would like it?" Zexion was at a loss for words. He knew what was coming next. He managed a nod. Demyx smiled. "Good…I...I want to ask her to marry me." That was when Zexion snapped. He grabbed both of the blond's shoulders and shoved him down on the bed.

"WHY HER!?" he shouted in question, making Demyx flinch. He stared up at the silverette with wide eyes.

"Z-zexy? What's wrong?" Zexion inhaled shakily. He shook his head.

"Don't tell me you haven't seen it? You haven't felt it at all?" The blond shook his head, trying to push the other boy off. Zexion leaned down and kissed Demyx's forehead. "I love you…I love you so fucking much…I know it hasn't even been a month but…Damn it all, you are the single most perfect person I've ever seen." The blond nodded slowly.

"Zexion, please get off me. We can talk about this—" His words were interrupted when the silverette's lips were pressed against his with bruising force. Demyx whimpered pulling his head to the side. "No…No, no, no! Let me go, Zexion!" Zexion gazed down at him. He grabbed both of the blonde's wrists and shoved them above his head, while at the same time pinning his legs with his own. He pressed his face against Demyx's.

"I will not let you go back to her…She wants you too much…It's like you belong to her or something…" The blond continued to stare. "Why can't _I _have you? Why!?"

"Zexion, what is wrong with you? Is it because I hugged you so much that you think suddenly I'm just going to accept this?" His eyes locked on the others. "This is rape." Zexion smirked.

"Then from this day on, even if I am nothing but a rapist to you…At least you'll know how I feel." He shifted his hands so that both of the blonde's wrists were in one hand. His other hand slowly unzipped Demyx's pants. The blonde's eyes became even wider.

"LET ME GO! I don't want this, Zexy…Please…don't…."The green-eyed teen started to cry. None the less, Zexion continued removing his friend's jeans. His right hand found it's way to feel Demyx's soft thigh. The blond kept whimpering pleas. "Let me go…Please…I won't tell anyone…I swear…just let me go…" It was hard for him to hear his love's sadness, so he decided to try and silence it by kissing the blond. Demyx made no response except for more sadness as the silverette showed intimacy that was unheard of for both of them. The blond squeezed his eyes and lips shut, making the tears fall slightly faster. The smaller teen's pants were finally gone…But Zexion still had to think about the undergarments. Demyx was shaking with fear and sadness.

"Calm down…The less you fight the better it will be…" Zexion licked the side of his neck.

"Don't…mommy, please…someone help me…" By this time, the blond was completely naked from the waist down. Zexion was working on his own jeans, continuing to pin down the struggling teen. Demyx's breaths were racked with sobs. His cries were beginning to become pitiful.

"Demyx…"

"Zexion, if you just let me go…We can forget this ever happened…and, and…please let me go…pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease…." Zexion shook his head. He used his knees to spread the blonde's legs.

"I love you." He raised the legs on his hips. "And I will never, ever forget this."

Zexion thrusted into something else that was just as tense as the rest of the blond's body…

Demyx screamed. A lot. They were both sent into a world of pain.

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Zexion glanced over at the unconscious form of his ex-best friend. He was lying half naked on the floor next to his, now, bloodstained mattress. He felt an extreme pang of guilt flow through his body repeatedly. This wasn't supposed to happen.

Nothing went according to the way he'd imagined.

This had turned out to be the very worst day of his life.

As he slowly walked out of Demyx's room, he turned back, debating whether or not he should leave at all. He kicked himself. _Of course I should leave…I just…_he couldn't even bring himself to think of what he'd just done.

"I'm sorry, Demyx…" He turned back to the door. "I love you so much…"

Demyx wasn't at school the next day…or the day after. When the weekend came, Zexion knew everything was over.

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If I'm so wonderful, then why am I so misunderstood?

Everybody has a reason for it except me.

It's the little things of my mind that we're all waiting for…

I never really knew what that thing down there was used for….

(have you guessed yet?)

Oh jeezumm…I love you guys.


	7. Futures

'(

'(

Chapter 7….

I'm angry at myself for the last one….

Zexion…is a bad man.

No more glomps for him…

He _will _stay away from Demyx…or I'm gonna stab someone.

…You're all weird.

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Futures

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Zexion sat with Sora on a bench near the front door of the school. Sora was the only one besides the silverette and the blond that knew about what Zexion had done. The brunette was quiet, glancing every once in a while at his friend.

"Zex…I…I will never believe you could do something like that." He wasn't whispering, but he was quiet enough that people couldn't hear him.

"Then explain why Demyx hasn't been at school for the past two days.."

"I can't do that." The brunette stood. "I also….I just can't deal with this right now. I'm going to go spend some time with my boyfriend…" He gave a small wave and left Zexion to wait for Demyx.

The blond did eventually come.

He didn't seem to notice the other teen watching him, but Zexion made note of every little thing. Demyx's eyes had deep, purplish circles under them. He obviously hadn't slept. Also, even though his sleeves were long, Zexion could see that his wrists were bruised, along with his neck. The silverette stood hastily and ran over to the blond. When Demyx caught sight of him, he walked backward until he ran into a wall. As Zexion came close, the blond made a yelping noise and made an attempt to cover his face with his hands.

"No…Zexion…please…let me go…I don't want this…" he repeated in a squeaky, child-like voice. Zexion touched one of the hands gently.

"Demyx…" he slowly pulled the hand away. Demyx was crying again. He held the hand in both of his own, rubbing it softly. "Don't cry…I didn't mean it…I'm so sorry…" the silverette's voice was quiet, and soothing. He wiped a tear from the teen's eye. "I love you..." Demyx suddenly tore his hand away and slapped Zexion.

"Don't say that! _NEVER _touch me, ever." He shoved the base of his hand into the cobalt-haired boy's stomach, making him fall to the ground. "Just…Don't talk to me either." Zexion reached for the blonds' ankle as he walked away, but fell back to the ground when the pain returned. Fortunately, Demyx was alright enough to fight. Unfortunately, Cloud was walking toward Zexion to figure out what was wrong. The last person in the world that he wanted knowing was his English teacher…and he was probably out of luck. The spiky-haired adult held a hand out to the boy.

"I don't know what's up…" Zexion grabbed the hand and Cloud helped him up. "I have a feeling I'm not really understanding the depths of that situation of yours. I want to talk to you after school about this. Just feel lucky that Principle Ansem isn't going to hear about this." The teen nodded, gazing at his teacher.

"Why were you here in the student halls so early?" Zexion inquired. Cloud had a completive look on his face.

"I'm not sure…See you fifth period." The teen stared at his teacher for a few moments, then turned and walked after Demyx. Why wouldn't a teacher know what he was doing?

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The First Ever Demyx POV

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Demyx put his hands on his head. Pain. That was all he could remember now when he thought about Zexion. Before, he felt affections of happiness and warmth…But it was like it was only yesterday…He didn't even notice when Mirai came and sat next to him. _Mirai…._It was all _her _fault. _If I hadn't been so fucking in love with her, we would have never come to this…._Zexion had only flipped when he had mentioned the girl. Would everything actually be better if he had never dated Mirai? He glanced over to where she had been, only to find her much, much closer.

"Dem? Are you okay?" she asked, "I've been trying to reach you in your little world, for like, the past ten minutes…" His eyes met hers, and suddenly she was quiet. Demyx hadn't told anyone what had been done to him...Just like he promised Zexion. He shook his head violently. The images of pain came back. The morning after he had barely been able to move, let alone go to school...so he just didn't go. The day after that was worse. He spent all of it washing his bloody sheets and trying to work past the soreness. That day, Demyx realized why it hurt less toward the end. Blood was a good lubricant for rapists…But was Zexion _really _a rapist? The blond wanted it to go back to them being close friends. He _did_, however, grasp the concept that Zexion was very much in love with him…and being just friends would hurt both of them. Demyx…God knew Demyx loved the guy back, but not like he was loved. Zexion was his best friend…

"Demyx, damn it! Pay attention!" Mirai was poking his shoulder. He glared at her.

"What do you want?" he half spat, half hissed at her. She glared back at him.

"If you want to break up with me, just ask."

"What?" Demyx was overcome with confusion.

"I've seen the way Zexion looks at you…and…Seriously, if I'm in your way, just go to him or something." She seemed really bored with what she was saying.

"I will _never _pick Zexion over you, Mirai. I love _you._ Don't ever think otherwise, okay?" he told her. She poked his face.

"But that's the thing…I don't think I _can_ love _you _if it's hurting my best friend." Her voice was soft, but she was serious. He stared at her in disbelief.

"What are you talking about? I love you, you can't leave me just because of Zexion!!" he felt tears coming on. "I would've married you…" She shook her head.

"Demyx…Calm down…" she clasped her hands together. "Don't cry…Someone's going to pick up where I left off…" He glared at her again.

"You're nothing but a heartless bitch with no soul." He shoved her. "Get away from me. I'm surprised I ever liked you at all."

Demyx sat there, alone as Mirai walked away, and started to cry.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

HOORAY! BACK TO ZEXY!!

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Zexion watched Demyx from across the hall. The clock above him told him he had at least five minutes left to talk to the blond before the first bell rang. He walked slowly over to the crying boy, slightly fearing getting hit in the sternum again. He sat by his love, but Demyx didn't seem to notice him. He touched the teen's shoulder, making him jump.

"Zexion!" he cried, hugging his knees to his body. "You scared the shit out of me…" The silverette smiled softly.

"Do you forgive me yet? It's been ten minutes…but a lot can happen in ten minutes…" The blond just stared at him. "What happened?" Demyx looked away. Zexion wasn't sure what was going on, but the blond wasn't sad because of him.

"Mirai left me…" he looked back, adding, "Because of you…" Zexion wanted to hug Demyx, but was still slightly afraid of the consequences of touching the teen.

"I knew she was a bitch. I just didn't expect her to do anything _that _stupid…" he glanced over at the blond. "Does this mean we're friends again?" Demyx glared at him. He glared back.

"I will never forgive you." Zexion nodded.

"Of course. I wouldn't have it any other way." The silverette looked toward the ceiling. "How's the puppy?" Demyx shrugged.

"I haven't given it a name yet."

"How about…'Spawn of Satan'?" he suggested, holding his hands out in front of him.

"It sounds better than anything I've thought of so far."

"So it's settled?"

"Spawn of Satan, it is."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

With most of my fanfics I like having 6 pages per chapter.

I'm laxing in that with this one, sadly.

So, yeah…Are you still continuing?

If you are, I love support…


	8. Last Time I Tried To Rock Your World

…

….

Chapter 8?

Oh, boy…To think the angsting has only just begun…

By the by…I'm sending ultra thanks in this chappy to the everamazing…

Sunlight Shinobi…yes I removed some X's...but…This magical person guessed the band.

Mindless Self Indulgence does my chapter names.

Now you should listen to those songs while reading the chapters.

Or else…

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Last Time I Tried to Rock Your World

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"Zexion..?" Demyx had been meek since they had spoken in the morning. The silverette couldn't blame him, but it almost scared Zexion that he was so quiet. Needless to say, lunch so far had been Hell…seeing as only three people in the world knew what was going on.

"Yes, Demyx?" his reply was gentle. The blond was very shaken whenever he spoke louder than a whisper, so he tried to be his quietest. Green eyes met his own.

"Why is it that you insist on being in love with _me_, of all people?" he inquired. Zexion watched the blonds' expression, measuring his seriousness. He looked down, embarrassed.

"I love you because you are you…The way you glomped me all the time…and all those hugs." He glanced back up, "And of course I love your eyes…and the way we first met…And _all _that cliché shit. I'm just…really sorry that I snapped…" The blond grabbed his hand from under the table.

"Zexion…we can still be friends," he squeezed the hand slightly; "The only problem is that you do love me. I'm not going to ask you to let that go….but it would be nice if you could." Zexion looked down at the table once more.

"I've been sitting here for the past month eating my heart out for you…And that's all you have to say?" Demyx didn't move, or even attempt to say anything. "If I wanted you bad enough to fuck you against your will, why won't you just be mine?" He pulled his hand out of the blonds' grasp. "I mean honest—"

"It's because you're my fucking best friend and the fact that you lost control all together..." Demyx interjected. "I've had some seriously fucked up relationships with people before…but you are, by far, the worst." Zexion nodded, staying silent for a time.

"I still love you."

"I know."

………………………………………………………………………………………………

After School….

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Demyx sat with Zexion, waiting for their English teacher, on a bench outside the school. Zexion had learned, by now, that for some strange reason, Demyx thought of him as his only friend. The silverette had no clue as to why, but he accepted it. He felt nothing but guilt just being around Demyx, but deep in his heart he felt extreme affection toward everything that the blond was. After what seemed like forever, their spiky haired English teacher emerged…with their brunette French teacher. Cloud immediately spotted the pair and both of the men started walking toward them.

"Zexion…Demyx…I'm glad you stayed." Cloud seemed excited. Mr.Leonhart simply watched. "Do you want to explain the situation…or would you rather I make observations and guess?" Demyx sighed deeply.

"I vote you guess." The silverette told the blond adult.

"Judging by the bruises on Demyx's wrists…He was raped. By the way you two have been acting in my class…I'm guessing that you're the culprit, Zexion." It was all Zexion could do to keep his jaw up. Demyx started quivering.

"Why do you care? How did you even know?" he glared at both of the men. "It's my business what Zexion does to my body…Not yours." The silverette became even closer to a jaw dropping motion. Never in his life had he imagined Demyx would say something like that…

"I care because it's affecting both of your schoolwork…Also; I'm concerned about your relationship. I'm not sure it's healthy for you two to remain friends after what you've gone through." Zexion stayed quiet.

"Why don't you fuck off and go fuck Leon, huh, Cloud?" Demyx's eyes were narrowed. "I don't want to talk about having my ass bleed for three days. And I don't want to talk about the issues I'm having with my fucking best friend. Especially not with you." Zexion stayed silent. This made Demyx badass…And he had no desire to halt the blonds' rise. "You fucking teachers…" Cloud just stared at him. He turned to the brunette.

"Leon, I guess it's up to you." The blond walked behind the taller man. Mr.Leonhart, or Leon, walked up to Demyx and Zexion.

"Rape is some serious shit."

"No fucking duh, you asshole." Demyx put his face very close to the teacher's. "I think all that matters is that we're good now. The fact that we can put this behind us is some serious loyal shit." The brunette smirked.

"Just because of the fact that you were willing to tell us you were actually raped, we could put your 'best friend' behind bars." Demyx leaned back a bit.

"Why would you? I'm not pressing charges."

"Because rape is wrong—"

"I DON'T CARE! YOU CAN'T TAKE ZEXY FROM ME!" Zexion couldn't take it anymore.

"I fucking love, Demyx, you assholes. Just leave us the fuck alone…." Leon glanced over his shoulder at Cloud, shaking his head.

"Let them rot in their own sorrow."

Before either of the teens knew it, the men were gone.

Zexion turned to the blond.

"Demyx…that's another example of why I love you."

"What is?"

"You are a badass."

"So?"

"It's awesome."

"And?"

"You're amazing."

"Does this mean something bad?"

"No…"

"Then why are we talking about it?"

"I don't know…"

"Wanna go to the mall or something?"

"My house?"

"Why your house?"

"Because my mom is home."

"Okay…Your house it is…"

And so, after a long pointless conversation, the pair ended up at Zexion's house.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"You have a guitar?" Demyx was rifling through his friend's possessions and had stumbled upon the stringed object. Zexion nodded.

"My father gave it to me when I was little," he explained, "I never really got around to learning to play it, though. Why? Do you play?" The blond lifted the instrument high into the air.

"I used to, but I haven't actually touched a guitar in a long time…After my mom got sent to prison, I never really had it in me." He looked back at the silverette, "She was the only one who ever wanted me to play." Zexion nodded slightly. Seeing as Demyx was feeling up to talk about family, he was obviously doing something right.

"Do you have one?" he questioned, trying to make the blond more comfortable by having a conversation. He shook his head.

"I burned mine about a year ago," he touched the guitar he held softly, "I have really bad memories about that thing…"

"Do you want mine?"

"You'd give it to me? Just like that?"

"Well, yeah…"

"But it's _yours._"

"Who cares? If it would make you happy, I'd give you anything." Zexion paused. "Anything in this world, or the next."

"Don't talk like that. It's only Monday and I'm already blue. You're just making it worse by saying all this nice shit."

"Oh? So all you're hearing from me is shit, is it?" The blond nodded.

"Duh…That's all I ever hear from you." He stuck his tongue out at Zexion. "Especially when you talk about math." Zexion smirked, then tackled Demyx. He started noogying the teen.

"You're just a meanie." The smaller boy covered his head with his hands, giggling. Then suddenly stopped. The silverette ceased, in turn, glancing at the blond. "What's wrong? Did I hurt you?" Demyx shook his head.

"Of course not…" He looked up at Zexion. "It's me that's hurting you."

"How?" Zexion was confused, yet again. The blond sighed, touching the neck of his friend's guitar.

"Giving me this…playing with me…I find it hard to believe that you have no issues with this." The silverette blinked a few times.

"Issues with what? Being able to play with you?"

"No…having to _only _play with me. Isn't it hard?" Demyx's voice seemed sad. Zexion looked around his room, then back at his friend.

"Sure it's hard…but it would be harder on you if I tried anything else."

The pair sat in silence for a time. Zexion touched the blonds' back.

"From now on, that is your guitar. And…if you ever feel lonely, you can come over any time." Demyx nodded, then shook his head.

"If you ever try anything without my consent, though…I will stab you."

………………………………………………………………………………………………  
Rar.

Hi.

Angsting? Maybe.

Masturbates may very well be a chapter….but I'm still unpracticed in the writing of pleasure.

See you.


	9. M

Miaow…

Miaow….

Chapter nine….

Didn't think I'd make it this far…like…

Ever…….

Thanks to anyone who's still keepin' up with me…

And to quote the MSI themselves:

I'm too old to be keeping up with all o' the kids.

Not really, though.

When 358/2 Days comes out in America, you guys should all play it, cuz even the Japanese version is fucking kick ass.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

M

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Zexion stared into space as he lay in his bed that night. Demyx had felt bad for him. The weight of guilt hung heavy in his heart. The blond was so forgiving that it made nuns pale in comparison. Even touching that boy made him feel worse for doing such horrible things to him. _This is worse than the first internal conflict…_he hissed at himself. A large pile of homework sat on his lap, and it was cutting off circulation, so he decided to start work on it.

"C'est le rancunier ce type…" he whispered angrily to his homework. French was one of his least favorite subjects, so Zexion made a point of getting better grades than anyone in the class. It was a good way of saying that the system could be defeated with effort. He jotted down answers at a practiced hasty pace, making sure to use verbs only the French Leon could _actually_ understand. Deep in his heart, Zexion just knew that Cloud was going to throw a hissy fit and give him lower grades for the incident that occurred earlier that day. And for some reason…

He didn't care.

Usually he liked to be friends with his teachers, stay out of trouble, and all that pussy good kid shit. While, during the time he spent with his friends, he was an in-your-face asshole-ish type of guy who liked blowing things up. In fact, Axel had been a great friend in giving him four pounds of C4 for his birthday. He used it all in one night. No one really noticed…except, maybe, the person whose house ended up with a washing machine on it's roof.

That was beside the point, though. His whole good-kid image, which he had been building up since junior high, was destroyed in less than ten minutes by the most amazing human being on the planet. What was the point of having good grades if all the teachers hated his guts?

Cloud seemed like the kind of person who would tell everyone in the faculty.

Leon seemed no less.

So why would he even have to do his homework? Zexion sat pondering for a few moments…Until he heard a gentle call from his mother. The silverette shoved the pile of papers on his lap, to the ground, standing. He walked down the hall to where his tall, brooding parent lived. He noticed her room was awfully…red, today. He warily entered, not knowing what to expect.

Zexion's mother was sitting in the middle of her bed, staring at the ceiling.

"Mom?" he approached slowly, "What's up?" She tilted her neck toward her son, blinking.

"I do believe that the ceiling is 'up'." She glanced back at the ceiling. "A few moments ago I got a call from your father….I think it was the only time you haven't answered the phone for me since he left." Zexion continued watching as his mother stared up.

"What did he say?" the teen asked in a quiet voice. She chuckled, then started laughing manically. After a few moments she suddenly stopped.

"He's coming home."

"Wait…what?"

"After all these years he's coming home for the first time." He saw her eyes turn over to stare at him. "I wonder how he's going to react to you. Last time he actually saw you, you were only eight." The silverette shook his head.

"Nine years and he just _now _decides to come back?" Zexion shook his head. "I refuse to see him."

"But, my Zexion, he's been trying, but you know he hasn't been able to come back till now."

The teen left the room, fuming with anger.

He didn't believe he had a father.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

School… (Lunch to be precise)

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"So…Yesterday I learned my dad's going to be coming home…" Zexion was talking to Sora. The brunette shrugged.

"You never talk about him…I kinda assumed he was dead…Or something." The blue-eyed teen grabbed a strand of Zexion's hair. The silverette stayed stationary as his friend began braiding his hair.

"He is dead…to me and my mom at least." He glanced up, earning a shove from Sora.

"Stay still!"

"Anyways…He barely even kept contact with us…It's been nine years and all we got was a few emails that told us of what an awesome time he was having…and he would occasionally leave messages on our phone while I was at school and mom was in a drug induced coma of a nap." Sora whistled.

"Harsh…What're you gonna do when he comes back?"

"I dunno…maybe I'll put a dildo in the mailbox and send him out to check for a letter from a college or something…"

"Yeeaaahhh…Like _that_ would work." Zexion smirked.

"If it worked on you, why wouldn't it work on someone who thinks I'm a goody-two-shoes boyscout?"

"Done…" Sora dropped his friends' hair and clapped his hands together.

"The only things is, is this is really hard on mom….I've been, pretty much, her only reason for staying in that house. I wonder what'll happen if he suddenly gives her the urge to leave." The brunette across the table pouted.

"Then you'll have to send me an email everyday till you can move back and go to Destiny University with all of us. I'll make sure Demyx does, too." Zexion ruffled Sora's hair.

"Oh yeah? Don't go making plans just yet, though, Princess Tiddlywinks." He grinned. "Maybe mom'll just get pissed and shove him into the wild."

"Where _is _Demyx, anyway?" The brunette suddenly asked. Zexion looked around, then shrugged.

"I dunno….Maybe he's sick—"

"Are you going to go check on him?" Sora jumped up with glee. The silverette just stared at his friend till he sat down.

"Are you insane? Or did you forget everything I've told you?" he sighed. "I'm not going to Dem's house anytime soon. He'll probably be scared." The silverette looked away. "I am _not _going to make him go through that again." Sora frowned.

"Well, but, what if you go to ask him a question?"

"And just what question would I ask, Sora?"

"A question you _haven't _asked before?"

"And what would that be?"

"How about you ask him out?"

"I've tried that..."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes. Really."

"And did you ask nicely?"

"Define 'nicely'."

"Did you ask him all polite-like, with flowers, and all that good stuff?"

"No…Why? Did Riku ask you like that?"

"No, that's just how everyone's supposed to ask."

"If I asked him out that way, he'd get scared."

"Why?" Zexion rolled his eyes.

"Because it's just _so _OOC for me."

"OOC? Wuz dat mean?"

"Out of character, my dear friend."

"I still vote you do it."

"Why?"

"Because I think it would be hilarious if you two ended up together."

"Sora, why is everything a joke for you?"

"Because it's better than killing yourself."

"But Sora, Don't you know? Suicide is the way of telling God, 'You can't fire me! I quit!"

The two teens laughed at the little joke up until the bell rang, several minutes later.

Zexion decided it might not be so bad to buy Demyx flowers.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

The Pet Store of Wonderful Furry Friends…..

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"Hmm…It's you?" Larxene, the ever vigilant pet shop employee commented when she saw Zexion walk through the door.

"Er…yeah…It's me?" the teen was kind of amused that she even recognized him at all.

"Come to rescue another puppy from the line of Euthanasia? Or is it time for a kitten? You seem like a cat guy to me." She teased. He chuckled softly, then turned serious.

"You're the only person I know who I can ask a question without getting laughed at." He rubbed his head. "And I know that's really, _really _pathetic seeing as I only met you, like, twice…" he explained to her. She nodded, grinning like a maniac.

"Ask away, oh, only customer of mine."

"Do you know where I can get a really nice bouquet of flowers for someone who loves blue?" Larxene blinked a few times, then nodded.

"Yeah…There's this chick named Aerith who runs a flower shop just across the street. It doesn't look like one, but it definitely is the best place you can go for awesomely colored flowers." She glanced up, then back at him. "Just in case you get lost, it's called 'Two Rings'…'Kay?" Zexion nodded quickly.

"Thank you, Ms.Larxene…"

"Just call me Larxene…You're officially me favorite customer, so why not?"

"Okay…Larxene. I'll see you later, then, I guess." She nodded with a smile.

"Keep off the crack, now, Fluffy silver boy."

"My name's Zexion."

"Whatever. Just keep off the crack, ya hear?"

"Sure. Why not?"

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Two Rings… (Aerith's magical flower shop of wonder)

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"So, this bouquet is for a boy?" The tall, brunette woman named Aerith asked, making Zexion blush insanely. He nodded.

"I'd rather you not say that out loud, please…" he told her. She giggled.

"Don't worry. I have a good friend named Leon that does the same thing. Every week he comes in and buys flowers for a good friend of mine." Zexion's eyes widened.

"You know Mr.Leonhart?" he asked in surprise. She smiled and nodded.

"Yes…I went to high school with him. Pray tell, do you know Cloud?" Zexion nodded.

"He's my English teacher." He explained. Aerith continued to smile.

"I won't tell them, I promise. I know nothing embarrasses a teenage boy more than having his teachers learn about his love life." she assured him. He nodded slightly.

"So, umm…What's my total for this thing?" Zexion hefted the large bouquet of blue chrysanthemums, lilies, and roses…which was surprisingly heavier than he would have ever imagined.

"That'll be twenty five munny. I'm giving you a discount because you're so dedicated." Zexion gave the amount asked to the woman, and hastily made his escape.

Any person who was friends with his teachers would soon know what he had said to them. That was never a good thing.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Outside of Demyx's House…..

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Zexion stood outside the blonds' door debating whether or not to ring his doorbell. He had gone through the trouble of buying a bouquet, so why not? But, on the other hand, he didn't want to scare the boy by showing up at his house. He inhaled deeply. Counting to three, he slowly reached his finger to the doorbell. Then he jerked it back. These actions repeated several times.

That is, until he heard the voice for the front time.

At first he assumed that his friend was listening to the radio…and that it was kind of loud. Then he realized that he recognized the singer. Demyx had the most beautiful voice he'd ever heard in his life. And just the thought of hearing him better prompted him to actually press the doorbell. The music stopped abruptly, then there was a pause. The blond opened his door slowly.

Zexion stared at him in awe, holding the bouquet. Demyx stared back at him, then cleared his throat.

"So...um...Zexy, what're you doing here?"

"Were you the one singing?"

"Eh…" he rubbed the back of his head, "Yeah, I guess I was." Zexion nodded, holding out the flowers to the teen. "Wh-what are these for??" The silverette blushed.

"Well…number one, that was the most amazing thing I've ever heard." The blond chuckled a little. "And number two…"

"Yes, Zexion? What's number two?" Demyx seemed anxious. Zexion looked away, then back. He had no better way to do things, so he got on one knee, looking at the ground. "Zexy?"

"Demyx…Will you be my boyfriend?" The silverette was glad his friend couldn't see the blush spreading through his face. "I know you swear up and down that you aren't gay, but…that's how I felt, too. Before I met you." The blond didn't answer. They stayed in silence for several minutes.

Just as Zexion glanced up, the flowers were dropped where his face was, and the other teen slammed the door, going back inside. The silverette stood quickly, wondering what had happened.

"DEMYX?" he called to the door. There was a small thump. "What's wrong…?" Zexion could have sworn he heard sobbing.

"Zexion…Have you ever read the bible?" Demyx's voice was muffled, but he spoke loud enough for his friend to hear. "What you're doing to me is the worst thing I've ever had to deal with."

"What do you mean?" The silverette took a step toward the door, putting his ear to the wood.

"**1 Cor. 6:9-10**,_ "Or do you not know that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, shall inherit the kingdom of God.__" He quoted, as if straight from the book. "You're damning me to an eternity of nothingness." Zexion was shocked. He hadn't ever imagined that his love was religious. He didn't understand, though. Was this why Demyx was so forgiving? Was this why he had been so reluctant to leave the silverette? Was it all just because of some guy who wrote a book that may or may not have been direct information?_

_Zexion put all of his weight against the door. He felt like an idiot. Why would Demyx's reaction suddenly be different __now __of all times? The silverette felt a stream of tears roll down his face at an exceptional rate. _

_Heartbreak hurt. He hadn't actually felt this way before. There was no chance he would ever be with Demyx. There was no chance he would ever be able to touch him again. _

_All the forgiveness in the world wouldn't mend his heart. Whatever Death Cab for Cutie claimed about love, they were obviously lying._

_Real pain didn't come close to what he felt at that moment…He gathered himself, and glanced down at the flowers the blond had thrown to the ground. They weren't damaged too badly…So he decided to leave them there. Maybe they would find themselves in the hands of their owner again…Zexion wanted to at least give __them __a chance._

_So he left._

_After this, his father would be a piece of toast to deal with._

_………………………………………………………………………………………………_

_Yet another Demyx POV…._

_………………………………………………………………………………………………_

_Demyx knelt against his door, waiting for his friend to leave. Why did it hurt so much to turn him away? He heard footstep crunching down his gravel driveway…then silence. He stood slowly, wiping tears from his face. He turned, opening the door, to find the flowers were still there. Zexion really __did __love him…didn't he?_

_He lifted the blue bouquet. The flowers were his favorite color._

_Zexion listened. Zexion was polite. Zexion…gave him a guitar._

_He wanted to love his friend back…but it went against everything he had ever learned. It went against every moral he'd ever had._

_He could never say yes. Even if he wanted to._

_………………………………………………………………………………………………_

_This is an example of my six page works. Magical, isn't it?_

_Continue reviewing, or you will receive no more chapters._

_No more reviews I might even discontinue it…or put it on indefinite hiatus…_

_Muahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahaaaa!_

_I threaten you emptily. _

_I love this fic too much to discontinue it. _


	10. You'll Rebel to Anything

Chapter 10

Chapter 10.

We've officially passed the speedbump of—

OHMYGOD DID LARXENE JUST CUT MY ARM OFF!?

That little cocaine addicted witch.

My forehead hurts…

And…No Zexy's were hurt in the making of this fanfiction.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

You'll Rebel to Anything

………………………………………………………………………………………………

"Awww…Zex that just sucks, huh?" Sora asked. He and Zexion were sitting at the local park, and the brunette was weaving flowers into his hair. "If it makes you feel any better, I'm always going to be here for you…" The silverette grunted, not wanting to move his head.

"I know, Sora…It why I've been friends with you since forever." He looked down at his hands. "It's just that this is the first time I've ever taken the time to be in love, ya know? I know that you've done this a few times before you ended up with Riku, but…I was always too much of an IB kid to think that love mattered." Out of the corner of his eye he saw Sora nod. Zexion sighed. This had been an incredibly awkward time in his life.

"Didn't you read 'The Princess Bride' for your ninth grade year, though?" the brunette pressed.

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"All that book is about is love, and what lengths some people would go through to make sure it was proven." He told the silverette.

"Well, yeah...but where in that book was there any explanation of rejection? Buttercup got every man she wanted and all that. Also, they didn't even tell Westley's side of the story. I don't understand how that would help." Zexion pick a few pieces of grass and through them in the air. "Where had Riku been for the past few days, anyway? You usually bring him along when we hang out." Sora gave a small laugh.

"Riku decided to do something stupid. He has to do five hundred hours of community service for it, too. Whenever he has time to work on it, he's taken the opportunity. I'm guessing neither of us are going to see much of him for the next few months." The brunette pulled at Zexion's hair a little, making him wince slightly.

"Gentle, would you?" Sora eased up on his hair a bit. "That sucks…I mean, why should _you _have to suffer with him?"

"I'm sure the police weren't thinking much about how his boyfriend would feel when they gave him the punishment."

"What'd he do, anyway?"

"He set a vending machine in a stone parking lot on fire." Zexion jumped slightly.

"And they only gave him that low of a sentence? Dude…Riku is lucky he isn't behind bars for arson right now." Sora sighed.

"I know, I know. I'm just grateful it wasn't worse." He ruffled his friend's hair. "Besides, they can't really prove it was him, so that's why they gave him such a minimal sentence." The brunette put both his hands on Zexion's back. "Done. Now you do me." The silverette stared at him in wonder.

"How am I supposed to weave flowers into _your _hair if I don't have the slightest clue where you got these ones?" Sora shrugged.

"If you're really _that _against it, wanna go to my place and start on your homework? I could help you with your French, and you could help me with my Math." Zexion rolled his eyes.

"Oh yes, that's _exactly _what I want to do right after I'm feeling better. Go into your dark hovel of a room and do homework." Sora pouted.

"It's not my fault mom put me in the basement. Ever since those storms started getting worse, she won't even let me go to the higher levels of the house anymore." The silverette grinned.

"Oh yeah? Well maybe if you didn't stay up all night on your computer when it _was _storming, maybe I would want to traverse down to your mo basement."

"Come _on, _you're way emo-er than I am, and you know it. I mean seriously…Look at you. Hair over the eye, permanent scowl when you're unhappy, you wear black long sleeves all the time..." He poked Zexion's stomach. "Plus, you're uber skinny." He smirked. "Who, that doesn't know you already, doesn't think you're emo?" The silverette frowned.

"I don't know…" suddenly a grin broke out on his face, and he tackled his friend, "But then again, I don't know many people who _don't _know me!" He rubbed Sora's head back and forth, messing up his seemingly perfect spikes. The grass was like a comfortable mattress, just waiting for them to fall on it.

It was nice to have friends. Zexion and Sora continued playing like children for the next several hours, until the sun started to go down. The silverette had never had so much fun procrastinating in his life.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

That Night…

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Zexion's mother was downstairs again. This time she was attempting to cook eggs. The silverette thanked the Gods that she had only just started, because even as he was just getting there, smoke was filling the house.

"MOM! Turn the oven off, NOW!" he pushed her out of the way, quickly twisting the knob for the burner to the 'Off' position. He glared at her. "Mom…How could you catch _eggs _on fire?" She stared at him.

"I like eggs…" she announced airily. Zexion stared at her, she stared back. The teen sighed, frustrated, then turned away and walked up the stairs. Even homework had to be better than dealing with his mother right now.

He pulled out his walkman and put in a CD that Sora had given him for his birthday. The first song was kind of confusing, and Zexion could have sworn more than half of it was sung backwards. Then the second song started. The lyrics were the funniest thing he had ever thought imaginable. Making a mental note to thank the brunette next time he saw him, Zexion started in on an equal pile of homework as the night before.

For the first time in his high school life, Zexion didn't start with French. He started with Math.

He giggled again at the song he was listening to. Stabby rip, stab, stab.

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The Next Morning… (yes school)

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Demyx wasn't present, yet again. Zexion was starting to get worried about the blond. At the same time, he was grateful to have some time away from the boy. Sora was a good person to have as a friend when everything was going in strange directions.

French was lonely without the blond, however. Everything was. His happiness and outgoing nature made everything seem lack luster. Sora was almost like him…but Demyx wasn't Sora.

No one could ever be Demyx. Just being around him was like being high…

It sucked not being able to see him.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

GASP! Demyx POV (which is becoming a frequent)

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Demyx had stayed home again due to an ever present fever. 33 C and rising. The encounter with Zexion yesterday had actually made it better…until he decided to ask _that _question. Hadn't rape been enough?

_No…_he thought, _He just didn't know I cared about religion. That was all._ His friend didn't know about anything that had to do with Christianity, obviously. He probably thought it was all some incoherent gibberish written by some king a couple thousand years ago. And Demyx couldn't blame him.

Because, in his heart, he wanted Zexion, too. If he ever ended up with a boyfriend, though…His father would most definitely disown him. Nothing in his life had ever been so hard. The loss of his mother, the loss of his beloved, being lonely for so many years…Nothing compared to what Zexion did to him.

He sat in silence, waiting for his Ibuprofen to kick in. Demyx wished he could call someone, so he wouldn't be so alone, but everyone was at school. He decided to try and take a nap until his headache started to fade.

The blond didn't care anymore.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

3 Hours Later….. (Teh OMG!)

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"The world was white. Draco turned to Harry and said, 'I love you...'…" Demyx read aloud, slightly giggling. While surfing the internet, he had stumbled upon a fanfiction about the one thing he recognized. Everything in the stories he'd read so far were so romantic, and they were gentle and kind…He was having trouble understanding the plot of the story though. It was nice to read something that was out of the box for him, but he found it strange as hell that everyone paired Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy, of all people. It was almost like if Roxas suddenly broke up with Axel, and dated Sora instead. Just the thought of it made him shiver.

He glanced at the clock on his computer. It was 4:37 P.M.

People would be home right now…but he didn't really know who to call. Seeing as he had sat there, either sleeping or thinking about Zexion, all day, who knows what he might end up telling the wrong person.

He debated whether he could call Sora. Sora seemed like the kind of person who would be really close friends with Zexion. Maybe the brunette would understand.

So he picked up the phone and called.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

An unheard of Zexion POV….

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"So-ra…" Currently, Zexion was on the phone with Sora. Again. He and the brunette were currently making plans to take over the world with half-man, half-cookie people. Sora was being difficult.

"I'm telling you, Zex… There's no way we will ever find anyone willing to participate in the project unless _you _and I start killing people. Zombies _can _make decent cookie warriors." Zexion could almost imagine Sora pouting. Suddenly there was a loud and strange beeping noise. There was a pause, then it happened again.

"What is _that_?"

"Zex, I think I have another call…Gimme a sec" There was a click, then a long silence, then another click. "It's Demyx…Do you want me to put him on our line, or should I let you go?" Zexion blinked a few times.

"I guess you could put him on the line with us. I'm just glad he's okay." There were several more clicks, a long beep, then he heard breathing.

"Was it just me…Or is your phone going to turn mine into a bomb and kill someone?" It was the blond's voice. Zexion couldn't speak. He heard Sora laugh.

"Last time my phone went 'splody was when Axel tied a firecracker to it." Zexion still couldn't speak.

"Didn't you say we were talking with Zexion, too?" Demyx asked. Sora sighed.

"I wonder if Zex hung up, though. He's been acting really weird about you lately." The brunette explained. Zexion gently pressed speakerphone on his receiver and set the phone on his bed. This conversation might be interesting if they thought he had hung up.

"What do you mean he's been acting weird?"

"Well…he talks about you a helluva lot more, and all that shit."

"That's it?"

"No…I spent the night at his house a few weekends ago and he talked in his sleep for the first time."

"And?"

"All he talked about was how awesome _you _were. Me and Zex have always been pretty tight, so I thought that was the most messed up thing."

"How is talking in your sleep messed up? I don't get it."

"Zexion's never done it before is the weird thing." Demyx grunted in response. "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure, what's up?"

"Do you like Zex? Like, at all? Or is he just wasting his life and his money on you?" There was a pause.

"You know, don't you?"

"About what?"

"About everything."

"Yes, actually, I do. Believe it or not, me and Zexion are like sisters, if nothing else. We talk about everything, and never spill secrets. So just tell me so I can make sure I know the answer. If you can talk to me about him, you can eventually tell him, too." There was another long silence.

"It was nice talking with you Sora." There was another click.

"Zexion? You're still on the line, aren't you?"

Zexion hung up his phone. _Well, THAT was an interesting conversation…_

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The Next Morning at School…..

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"Why did you tell him?" Demyx asked Zexion as they sat in the halls waiting for the bell to ring.

"Tell who?" The silverette acted as if he'd heard nothing the night before.

"Sora."

"Tell him what?"

"About us." Zexion turned and stared at Demyx in astonishment.

"There's an 'us'? Really?" The blond glared at him.

"Just tell me why."

"Because Sora is like my little sister. I can tell him anything, and he keeps himself shut like he was welded together with hot iron." Demyx continued to glare at him.

"If you're that much of a woman, why don't you take it instead of give it?"

"Because I never experienced a Lolita Complex, like Sora did." He told his friend cheerfully. The blond turned away from him.

"Don't you realize this means war?" he asked coldly. Zexion chuckled.

"Of course…But love is so much better than war."

"Says you."

"Says everybody."

"HI ZEXION!!" The pair was greeted by a flying glomp from Sora. The brunette glanced over. "Oh yeah…Hi Dem." He gave a small wave to the blond, then turned back to the silverette. "Guess what!"

"What?" Zexion asked, earning a pleased expression from his friend.

"They're cutting Riku's hours in half since he's been being a good student and citizen! It's so exciting!" The silverette smiled at his friend.

"Yeah, it is. How is he anyway?"

"He's GREAT! I missed him…" Sora blushed. "It feels weird to think about how sexual innuendo jokes could be inserted at this point…." Demyx giggled.

"I just realized something…" The two other teens glanced at him. "We're just like a bunch of girls." Zexion laughed and Sora blushed.

"You're right, Dem…We are, aren't we?" The silverette agreed.

Just then, the bell rang, and they all shuffled into their assorted classrooms.

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0-0

Gasp.

33 C is around the equivalent of 100.6 F in degrees.

The first song on Zexion's CD was Whipstickagostop…the second is I Must Be Emo…Then The Panda Song…

Rar…

Continue reviews….or chapters will get all short and lazy…

I won't discontinue…but I will get lazy….

I can _do _that.

Zexion is a doctore who will replace your liver with a fircracker and your brain with an oreo.

"I'm a little bomb in your kidney.

Here is my trigger, here is my fuse.

If you don't go fight, I'll kill you.

Don't piss me off if you want to live."-The Ansem Retort #115

Sung to the tune of "I'm a Little Teapot."


	11. London Bridge

-

-

Yay. Chapter 11….

Never imagined people would actually like it.

This is actually kinda cool.

Chapter Dedicated to Ms.MinaMina cuz she luvses it so much.

RRAR!

Christian fucking Bale.

(And for the people who might care…Never Wanted to Dance-Combichrist Electrohurtz mix is amazing for MSI fans.)

…………………………………………………………………………………...

London Bridge…..

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"So, how long have you and Sora known eachother?" Demyx questioned as he and Zexion sat at lunch. The silverette glanced up from what he was eating.

"I've known Sora since the beginning of sixth grade when he transferred to my elementary school…" he explained. Then added, "Why?" The blond sighed and looked away.

"I just wouldn't have ever guessed he knew. That kid acts the same around us all the time, huh?" he replied in question. The silverette shook his head.

"Nah…he just doesn't like getting involved in things that would affect him badly. Sora is like the boy scout that never was." Demyx sighed, watching Zexion eat his French toast (XD). "I wish Riku would have more community service time, though. It's fun spending time with Sora when he isn't being drooled on by his boyfriend." The blond made a snorting noise.

"Does everyone you know have a boyfriend?" he asked sarcastically. The silverette shook his head.

"You don't. I don't. Larxene might. Aerith doesn't."

"Who were the last two?"

"People I know."

"Duh, tell me somethin' I _don't _know." The blond was getting more and more sarcastic.

"There's a lot of stuff you don't know. We can talk about that later, though." Zexion told him, in an attempt to break his growing bad mood. "How's Spawn of Satan?"

"Satan Spawn is fine…He's getting bigger, which is good. I'll bring him over to your house sometime." Demyx answered. The silverette nodded.

"Sounds good." He shoved the last of the bread in his mouth and chewed slowly. "You know what? This is turning out to be a good day." The blond nodded slightly, leaning his face on his hand.

"…Hurray." His voice was flat. Zexion pouted at him.

"Aw, come on. You're being more of an emo kid than _I _am." He smirked "What are you? Scared?" Demyx shot an angry glance at him.

"Do you know how obnoxious you are? Like, _all _the time? It's annoying…" he looked down at his hands, "I-it's just going to be the death of me someday."

"I knew it, you _are _emo."

"WOULD YOU JUST _SHUT UP?_" The tone of the blond's voice made several people stop and stare. He glared at all of them, then back at Zexion. "This is like torture, you know that? I'm hurting you everyday…I'm hurting myself everyday. How can you always just be so calm?" he paused, stared down at the table. "How could you have told Sora?" It took a few second for the silverette to notice that Demyx was crying. "Why did you tell Sora?" Zexion made an attempt to touch the teen, only to have his hand batted away.

"I don't know why I told Sora….I didn't realize you would ever find out tha—"

"Well, I did!" The blond interjected. "There's no fixing what you did. Not the fact that it happened, not the fact that Sora knows, and you can't fix the fact of what it did to me." His tears were splashing on the table. "You ruined my life, you asshole."

"Demyx…" Zexion put his head in his hands. "I thought we were past all of this. I thought—"

"You thought _wrong…_Honestly. Didn't I _just _tell you how I felt?" The blond stared into the silverette's eyes. "There's no fixing what you did…" The opposite teen looked away.

"Do you want me to leave?" he asked quietly. Demyx glared at him, eyes filled with tears.

"You haven't listened to word I've said, have you?" Zexion gave him a puzzled look.

"What do you mean? You just told me I ruined your life." The blond shook his head, and chuckled angrily through the tears.

"You don't get it…And that's just sad."

The bell rang, making the silverette jump. It had been a half hour already?

Demyx left without another word and went to class. Zexion remained confused at the blond's reaction, but also went to his respective classroom.

………………………………………………………………………………………………

Later….

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Zexion made an attempt to catch up with Demyx after school, but no one had seen him since lunch. Yet again, the silverette was worried. He didn't want to go to the blond's house again due to the circumstances of the last time…So he made the decision to, instead, call him using the number left on his caller ID. The silverette left school as soon as physically possible.

When he got home, he was greeted by something…unusual. There was an unfamiliar car in the driveway, and it had a strange license plate.

He ran inside at an alarming rate, and straight up stairs. The teen's father had obviously come back…And Zexion wanted to avoid him at all costs. He dropped his backpack in the corner of his room, and made his way to the bed. The lifted the receiver of the phone on his nightstand. He figured there were two options…

1: Call Demyx and become immersed in an argument with the blond until his father realized he was home, or…

2: Call Demyx and talk until he starts yelling or gets pissed off, and end up throwing the phone at his father when he attempted to enter the room.

Zexion couldn't decide, so he chose to go with just calling the blond and seeing what happened. The teen dialed the number and waited while the ringing went on.

"Hello?"

"Demyx?"

"Zexion?"

"Yeah…Um…I was wondering if we could talk about what happened today…." Pause.

"Why do you want to talk about it?"

"Because I want to know what the fuck is wrong with you these days." He sighed. "I'm worried about you…And I want to know if I can help."

"How could you help at all? Honestly…You didn't even understand what I was talking about when I was telling you how I felt."

"I didn't understand because you got pissed because I interpreted your words the exact way you said them." Zexion argued. It felt strange to be angry at the blond, but he was.

"You don't understand."

"Then help me understand. Whatever I don't know…I can do this if you help me…"

"I can't just help you. You have to try harder."

"I'm trying as hard as I fucking can. When did you become such a dick?" There was yet another pause.

"I became a dick when I was completely destroyed by the one I love most." Zexion paused this time.

"Mirai screwed you up _that _bad? I'll kill the bitch—"

"You're either slow or really fucking stupid, Zex." There was a click, then a repeated beeping noise. Demyx had hung up on him. The teen was almost shocked. Why would the blond hang up about something so stupid? Or was it not stupid, and that was why he hung up? Either way it was all starting to piss him off.

Suddenly the phone rang in his hand.

He clicked the 'Talk' button on the receiver quickly.

"Hello?" he started, slowly.

"Zexion?" it was Sora…"Can I come over to your house tonight?" There was a sniffling noise.

"Why? What's wrong, Sora?" Zexion pushed the phone closer to his ear.

"….."

"Tell me, So…"

"….Mom kicked me out…"

"What!? WHY?" he was practically shouting, now. There was silence for a moment, followed by a sniffle.

"Mom…Got drunk….I don't know why…She just got really angry when she saw that picture I have of me and Riku…." He sniffled again. "She knows about us and all that…but I'm not really welcome in the house for the next few days…I would have called Riku…but he's got that Community Service stuff…" Zexion sighed.

"Of course you can come over Sora…You don't even have to ask..."

"Thank you, Zex…." Sora hung up suddenly. The teen growled. What was with people today and hanging up without closure? He put the phone back in its charger and stared at his door. Lying back against the bed frame, he started to ponder what Demyx had been talking about.

He thought about it enough that he fell asleep, even before Sora arrived.

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.

Yet again another short chapter….

Sadly, even though it was to Ms.MinaMina…

The lack of love from spectators is making me go slower….

It's also making my back hurt….

I have the urge to read Loveless now…

See the later when me charge returns.


	12. Never Wanted To Dance

Rar!

Chapter twelve…

I miss a lot of my other fanfics already….They're so far behind….

Heh…well…Sucks for them.

I might still be lacking cuz I discovered Rizelmine, Grim Tales From Down Below, and Bokusatsu Tenshi Dokuro-chan all at the same time. Plus my school work takes forever to get done with.

NOW! Time for happy Sven death and Avenue Q…

Translation: Let's start….

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Never Wanted to Dance….

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Zexion was awakened by a light slap on his face. He forced his eyes open groggily to reveal Sora, leaning over him. The silverette sighed deeply and sat up. The brunette gazed at him with a strange expression. The cobalt-haired teen stared at him.

"What? Why are you looking at me funny?" he asked trying to regain his thoughts. Sora smiled slightly.

"Zex…uh…I just got here…" he stammered, "but…Um…Your dad kinda wants to talk to you or something….He got pissed at me because I came in without knocking, but your mom covered for me." The silverette groaned, standing.

"That fucking idiot…why does he think for a second that I actually want to communicate with him?" he growled angrily. He trudged over to the door, then glanced at his friend. "Do you want to come, or would you rather stay up here?" Sora shrugged.

"After what he said, I'd rather stay up here."

"What did he say?"

"That he couldn't believe some little Juvenile Delinquent like me would ever get along with someone like you."

"Well then fuck him. I'll stay up here with you if he told you that." The brunette shook his head.

"Go down and talk to him. It's not like I haven't been to your house before." Zexion gave him a pained look.

"Yeah, but—"

"Go. Or else….I'll break your alarm clock or something…." He threatened. The silverette sighed through his nose, and shrugged.

"Whatever…" he walked through the door and made his way down the stairs.

Zexion's father was a scary man.

He was tall, brooding, strong, and possibly homicidal. In front of him was the last place in the world the teen wanted to be. As his father stared him down with cold eyes, Zexion simply walked into the kitchen and inspected the contents of his fridge. Avoiding the man was the best chance he had at not hearing his voice.

A dead man talking was not a welcome sound.

"Zexion…Aren't you even going to say hello?" his mother said, intervening in his thoughts. He looked at her with an innocent gaze.

"Say hello to who?" his voice was also innocent. Zexion's father was glaring daggers at him. His mother simply closed her eyes nodding slowly to him.

"Me." The voice was deep, but somehow gentle. The teen turned to his father, shaking his head.

"Why would I say hello to someone I don't even know?" With those few words, he went back up the stairs to his room. Sora gazed at him with wide eyes. The brunette had obviously heard the entire conversation. The blue-eyed teen looked at his lap, then back at Zexion.

"Why would you say that to him?" there was disbelief in his friend's voice.

"Because dead men aren't supposed to talk."

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The Next Morning….

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"Zexion? Hey?" Sora was waving his hand in front of the silverette's face. He started blinking, then glanced at the brunette. "What the fuck is up with you these days? It's like you're a talking zombie or something…Whatever happened to the totally excitable, almost-on-crack Zexion?" Zexion sighed, and looked down.

"That side of me died when I met Demyx. It's all his fucking fault." he told the brunette, he voice laced with hatred. Sora took a step away from his friend.

"Dude…On the freaky level…You just went from Sweeney Todd to Hard Candy." He shook his head. "This is all just screwed up to hell. You and blondy have to get _over _it." The silverette glared at his friend.

"You're just making this worse, you know…"

"Yeah. I kinda figured that one out." The brunette admitted. He glanced at Zexion. "I figured he'd at least give you a birthday present…" The silverette jumped. Pulling his backpack to his front, Zexion reached his hand in removing the white box Demyx had given him on Valentine's Day.

"I forgot about it! Demyx gave me this the day of that _incident_." Sora gazed at him with wide eyes.

"I wonder what it is…" Zexion shrugged and pulled off the cut, little ribbon holding the box together.

Grasping the lid, which felt heavier than it actually was, the silverette opened it-emotion glazing over his eyes. "Demyx…" his voice was barely above a whisper as he lifted a small object from the box. He glanced at Sora, who smiled softly at him.

"I told you that you two would be cute together…" the brunette's voice sounded quieter, and kinder than it usually was. Zexion slowly put his gift back into its box, shoving the small container in the pocket of his jacket. The silverette looked at his friend, then looked forward.

"Sora…You can walk to school alone right?" his voice was louder, but still quieter than usual. Sora gave an understanding nod. "I'll see you later then."

Zexion broke into a straight run in the opposite direction of the school, toward where Demyx lived. As long as he made it in time, the silverette didn't care about much else.

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Demyx POV…YAY!

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The blond sneezed loudly in the cold morning air. Sometimes he wished he had a bike so it wouldn't take so long to get to school…but on the other hand, walking gave him time to think about the strange things that were constantly occurring as of late.

Zexion was the big problem.

Demyx knew the other teen loved him. Probably more than any of his friends or any people he had known before. That fact had sunken in quite a while ago. What he didn't understand, however, was why Zexion was so incredibly insistent on not understanding how he felt. The blond had been thinking over what had happened constantly.

There was no helping that.

He _did _have feelings for the silverette. Zexion had become the most important person in his entire life. He wanted to see him…but he also feared his friend. The other teen spoke so gently, and when the two touched, he was never untender. Demyx's eyes softened as he glanced to the sky. Zexion was so kind. Even through all he had done, the silverette still possessed a heart of gold. The blonde sighed quietly.

"The least Zexion could do is figure out how I feel about him…" his words cut through the silence, but he was positive no on was around to hear them. His head shot down and he stared forward when he heard the gentle crunching of gravel beneath someone's feet beside his own. Demyx's eyes felt like they were about to explode…

Zexion was right there in front of him. He had heard, hadn't he?

The silverette smiled slightly up at his friend. The green eyes that met the blonde's were soft and emotional. The other teen took a small step forward, reaching his hand slowly in his jacket pocket. Demyx took the same length step backward. Trusting Zexion to put his hand in his pocket might be unsafe…But who was judging?

"Demyx…" The green eyes continue to match the blonde's. Demyx swallowed slowly. Regardless of all he felt for his friend, he still couldn't help being terrified when they were alone together. His inhaled sharply through his nose in an attempt to calm himself. The blond closed his eyes, unaware that the silverette was still speaking. Or at least, he thought that maybe Zexion was speaking…He couldn't tell.

"Why're you here…?" The blonde's words were pained and quiet. His chest tightened a bit. The silverette glanced away, then back, holding his hand forward. Demyx eyed the offering cautiously. It was a little white box…A lot like the one he had given his friend for Valentine's Day.

"I wanted you to know that….I really appreciate this…." Zexion sighed. The blond could swear he saw tears gathering in his eyes. "I'm…sorry I forgot about even opening it when you gave it to me. I…" He looked away again, pulling his hand back, cradling the object in both if his palms. Demyx shook his head suddenly. Swallowing all of his fear, the teen took a large step toward Zexion. Close enough to touch.

"Zexion….I…." The silverette was gazing into his eyes. The blond felt like crying. "Until I met you I didn't actually believe in love. Mirai was a kind of fling….that grew out of nothingness. She was one of those things that just has to happen in high school. The first girlfriend.

"And then I met you…I started actually feeling things for her…But I guess I was, in reality, feeling those things for you. I was just too damn stupid and conceded and…Fucking religious to see—"Zexion sighed heavily.

"Would you shut up with all that stupid soppy bullshit? We both know all you're gonna say is that you're 'sorry', and that 'you were blind to temptations'…And the oh so famous, 'I didn't mean it.'," The silverettte's sudden change in attitude had Demyx taken aback. A confused look crept onto the blonde's face. "You know I love you Dem. There's never going to be anything to change that…Except for you trying to pull off the 'oh I'm nothing but shit, pity me,' act." The silverette pushed some of his hair over his ear. The blonde shook his head, again.

"Zexion you're not understanding what I'm trying to tell you."

"Uh, yeah. I think I do."

"How can you even understand if you won't let me speak?"

"My heart feels like it's going to stop every time I see you. And you know what? Even if we end up hours late for fucking school, I am going to get it through your thick skull that I understand everything now." Demyx stared at the silverette. A small tear escaped from the corner of his eye. What in the world was going on?

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Oh Dear…Zexy POV…

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Zexion knew it all just by the way Demyx was acting. It had been the silverette all along. There was never any Mirai and Demyx…It was always just Zexion and Demyx…And that little fuck tortured him for it. The blond was crying. _Of course…_ the silverette felt slightly guilty. _I suck at this…_ He wanted to hug the other teen, just to stop all the tears, but he held himself back. Demyx was most likely still a bit afraid of him…He could give the blonde that much, at least. It didn't really surprise him that the blonde would be confessing his feelings over the gift—but then again, he could have been coming to school just to tell his friend his feelings. Demyx being sick and all, maybe he was only coming for the silverette's sake. He kicked himself mentally. The other teen didn't seem like the kind who would risk his own life just to tell someone anything. But, then again, he didn't expect Demyx to do a lot of things that he actually did end up doing. Sighing deeply, Zexion shook his head.

"Dem, look—"

"Zexy, I'm _sorry!"_ Zexion sighed again.

"Yeah, I know. You're sorry, I'm sorry, _everyone's_ sorry. There's just nothing you can honestly say that could ever make that statement less true." The blonde's teary eyes met the silverette's.

"FINE then, Zexy….What the fuck do you want me to do to prove to you that I am truly apologizing to you?"

"What would you be apologizing for..?" the silverette's voice held true curiosity. Demyx squeezed his eyes shut.

"For hurting you, for lying to you….For making you miserable…" his voice was barely above a whisper, racked with sobs. Zexion chuckled softly, shaking his head.

"You mean, for making my life a better place, for giving me a reason to laugh…And of course for letting me love you?" The blonde didn't move. At all. In fact, Zexion thought he stopped breathing, too. "Dem? You okay?" Demyx inhaled shakily. His blue eyes revealed themselves to the other teen once more. Blinking, he looked down then back up at the blonde. It was almost an anomaly that someone like Demyx should be crying over just a few words.

"Zex-on…." He hiccupped while saying the word. He ended up saying it a bit off. "I dun't git you a' all….." His nose ran don't his face, dripping softly on his jacket. The cold and silent air around them amplified the sounds of the smaller teen's sobs and hiccups. Zexion was beginning to become concerned about their location. No one seemed to be around, but the silverette wasn't really in the mood for any more adults interfering with their relationship. Sighing again, he swiftly grabbed the blonde's hand.

"Come on then. We have to go to school." With a gentle smile toward the other boy, they began walking toward their destination, hand in hand.

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NOT THE END! Lunch!

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Zexion noticed that Sora wouldn't stop staring at the pair during lunch. The brunette seemed to start suspecting something when the teens came, not only late for school by nearly twenty minutes, but holding each other's hands. During Anatomy the silverette shrugged off several questions asked by his friend, but couldn't help but answer only one.

(~*ooo! Flashback*~)

"Hey! Zexion! Why won't you answer me…like…anything?"

"Because I just don't want to right now. Demyx got mad enough at me for just confiding in you in general."

"Fine then. But can I at least ask….Are you two, like, an item like me and Riku now…or what?"

"I don't know what we are Sora…."

"I ditched class to wait for you. I _saw _you guys this morning. How can you _not _know what happened?"

"The only thing I can say for sure is that I know he loves me back, now."

(~*Ending of the spooky flashback*~)

"Zexion!" a familiar voice broke into his train of thought. Axel grabbed his shoulder gruffly and smiled. "Dude, we haven't talk in forever. I just figured, 'Hey', ya know, it's yur birthday and all that tomorrow, and I might as well get ya a gift…" Zexion smiled back at the red-head, chuckling softly.

"I'm kinda regretting this whole not really being in touch with you thing, now. If I hadn't not talked to you, you might still be normal." His joke was in high spirits, but Axel just continued to smile. It was almost unlike the teen not to laugh at a stupid joke. His friend sighed deeply, taking his hand off the silverette's shoulder. Zexion gazed up at his friend. Demyx moved slightly in the corner of his eye.

"Zex…" The red-head was uncharacteristically depressing today. Just the fact that he wasn't happy at heart seemed to be bringing everyone down. The silverette glanced around the table to see everyone…kind of staring at him. "I feel really stupid that I never told you this before, but I'm really worried about you. We all are." He gestured to the rest of the people sitting at the table. Zexion, eyes widening, glanced at the people sitting at the table, to Demyx, then back to Axel.

"O-okay…enough joking. What the fuck is this about?" His voice, uncontrollably, became filled with a hint of panic. This wasn't good. They were all _worried_ could only mean so many things. Bad things were at the top of that list. The thought made his stomach start to flutter.

"I don't want to sound weird or cliché or anything, but…In the past few weeks you've had a lot of drastic changes from the way you live…to even your personality…" The red-head seemed almost as upset about this as Zexion was, himself. "Zexion…Do you ever think about hurting yourself?"

With just those words, Zexion had, literally, flung the chair over standing up. Demyx visibly jumped, and he started standing, only to be pushed down by a concerned Sora. The silverette saw his brunette friend whisper something in his love's ear, which seemed to calm him down visibly.

"Why is the_ FUCK _would I _ever _hurt myself?" Zexion grabbed his head in his hands. "Now that I've finally got on good terms with teachers again…My mom's happy…And to top it all off I finally have true love right in my lap…And _you _think _I _want to hurt myself? What is wrong with you people?" He turned his gaze from Axel to the rest of his friends at the table. "All _my _problems lately, though you are my best friends, are _not _your problems. PLEASE stay out of this for a bit and it'll get better." His panicked mood softened a bit. "I swear." Axel sighed again, then got a huge grin on his face.

"If you say so, man." Suddenly he grabbed the silverette around both shoulders. "So, tell me…Who's the lucky 'true love in your lap'?" Zexion grinned back, shoving his friend back playfully. His eyes met the other teen's green ones.

"Look really hard and you might find him. I mean honestly. You think I'd make it that easy for you?" He glanced over at the red-head's boyfriend, Roxas. "You had me guessing for nearly a month that Blondy over there was yours. Why would you think I was gonna just tell ya?"

"Because I'm amazing."

"No…_I'm _amazing. And you know it." Axel giggled (yes, girly) at this notion.

"Yeah, I guess I do." And with that, the red-head sat back down next to his little Roxas. The silverette, likewise, took his seat across from Demyx and Sora. The air sort of gazed at their friend with new eyes. The blond seemed the most surprised…But tenderly grasped the silverette's hand from across the table. Zexion's eyes immediately met the other teen's. Demyx smiled at him.

"I just realized I never told you the answer to the question you asked before…" his voice was really soft, but it was manageable to make out over the bustle of the lunchroom. The silverette was puzzled.

"What question?" his reply was almost as quiet as Demyx's had been. The blond looked down, smiling a bit more. Light pink shades slowly overtook his cheeks.

"If I'd be your boyfriend…" Zexion also looked down. He was nearly positive he must have been blushing, too. The pair was almost unaware of Sora's watchful gaze over them, also.

"O-oh…._That _question….right…." He felt his friend's grip tighten softly.

"I _do _love you….really….I realize that now…." Zexion nodded, not even knowing if Demyx could see. "Sooo…." The silverette glanced up, meeting the other teen's eyes… "I guess I'm telling you that my answer is yes….If any of this ever made any sense…" Zexion suddenly felt like his heart was going to explode. He inhaled deeply; his grin spreading as far as his cheeks would let it. Jumping up, he leaned over the table, tightly embracing his new boyfriend.

"OMIGOD I LOVE YOU!!!!!" The blond's hand came up to Zexion's arm. It was nice.

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In the spirit of Love, I release this chapter to you as a kind of…welll…Christmas gift.

Merry Christmas guys.

Oh yeah, I _will _eventually tell you what the hell Demyx gave Zexion in that little box…BUT!

No excuses anymore.

# Number 1 Reason I've been taking so long with my chapters:

I now have myself my very own Zexion…Meaning boyfriend, that is.

I get really distracted, so I'm not sure when the next chapter will come.

Plus I've still got school, so I'm realllllllllyyyy sorry you guys.

BUT I LOVE YOU ALL!

Remember!

Pressure equals faster!

Since only one person even pressured me last time, I didn't go very fast.

But if all of you chip in, you might have it by January!


	13. Bring the Pain

FINALLY!

The unlucky Chapter 13.

I totally am going to make this chapter with ONLY Hellogoodbye playing in the background, so it's gonna get all un-emo!

I'm trying!

Just in case you're wondering, I'm working for you.

Whoever you are, just sitting here reading this.

Yes. You.

I love you…platonically unless you're "name" is the gruesome Johnny Nauseous. Or you're birth initials are B.W.S.

Yes.

Oh yeah….I don't actually _know _what Zexy's birthday is. I figured I'd throw that out there….And, I know I changed the box's color. Get over it.

ALSO! That is a real horoscope right there. Irony is great.

Okay….Story time….right…..

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Bring the Pain

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Together at last. Zexion lay in his bed, gazing up at the ceiling. Somehow he'd managed to avoid his father completely today, and Sora was all set up in the corner. It was extremely unlike anyone in the brunette's family to ever get angry to this extent, so housing his friend was no problem. It would all blow over soon, he was sure. The silverette glanced over at Sora, who was laying against the wall, eyes closed, CD player blaring through headphones…It was all because of that one boy that he had ever pursued any of his feelings for Demyx at all. His encouragement. All the pain and happiness that went with it, too. The teen felt almost stupid for going all out on a silly whim, but then suddenly he just didn't care.

He had everything now…Save a happy family.

But, then again, Demyx was probably all he would ever need. His stupid, stupid brunette little brother/sister had made his life a paradise. He chuckled under his breath, returning his gaze to the roof. (Eh, ceiling, whatever) This was turning out to be a better semester than he had ever expected.

And yet he didn't feel happy.

Well, he _did _feel happy about finally being with Demyx and getting on better terms with his friends…but his heart wasn't in it. A million and one things were still coming. He couldn't stop them, but he knew he could prepare for them. Becoming happy again would only hurt him…Being happy when he had met Demyx taught him that much. It wasn't very enjoyable to have your heart broken, so the silverette had decided earlier in the day that he was going to try to avoid going back to the way he had been. Sure, he would be kind of happy, but he wouldn't go all happy. He wasn't even sure if that was physically possible anymore, anyway. He rolled onto his side, watching as Sora swayed back and forth, lip-synching with his music. The cobalt-haired teen silently wished that the brunette would be welcome back at his own home soon. It was embarrassing to have depressing, emo thoughts when other people were around.

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About three hours later… (Around 7P.M.)

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Sora held the astrology magazine up to his silver-haired friend.

"Read it. Seriously!" his voice was sharpish. "Honestly man, it _can _help you with your life." Zexion rolled his eyes, sighing. For the past twenty minutes the brunette had been pestering him about reading about some weird signs from the stars. Taking the magazine, he scanned the page it was open to until he found his birth date.

He scoffed at the description:

~You're not losing your mind. You're right to feel a bit worried about exactly what might come of a current situation, especially because things have been going so darned well. But you don't need to take that worry any further. The heavens have arranged for some very deep emotions to touch both your hearts. If your current situation is totally unlike anything you've experienced before, relax. It's going to last. ~

Sora was grinning like a maniac.

Zexion frowned at him.

"This doesn't mean _anything, _Sora. Maybe I'd believe it more if it said something more like, 'Today you will get angry at the one you love, _then _insert romance into everything you do.'" He handed the magazine back to his friend. "These are just suggestions for people to live their lives by…not what actually happens." The brunette shook his head in protest.

"I read it every day before I go to bed and it always sums up what happened in the day. It's like a reflective journal someone else wrote." He explained happily. The silverette shuddered visibly. "What's wrong?" Zexion made an exaggerated gagging motion.

"Don't ever remind me of reflective journals ever again….That was the one thing I loved leaving behind when I reached junior-hood." He was trying to make his voice as dark and creepy as he could, but he only succeeded in making Sora giggle. "It's true. Those are definitely the worst things about school in general. I heard you guys didn't have to do them _till _junior year, though."

Sora sat with his head in hid hands, gazing up at his friend with a small grin on his face. Zexion pouted back. The two continued staring at each other until, like a beckon from the heavens, the chirp of the phone ringing broke their concentration. The silverette jumped and grabbed the object off its charger. Glancing over at Sora he brought the receiver to his ear. The brunette was smirking at him.

"-------------Hello?" His pause was due to Sora grinning even wider and nodding. Heavy breaths on the other side of the line told that whoever it was seemed nervous.

"Err…Zexy?" The blonde's voice filled Zexion's soul was a fuzzy feeling. The brunette was smiling a bit more…. The silverette nodded at him when his glance asked the simplest question. Is it Demyx?

"Yeah, it's me. How's it goin' Satan?" his voice became filled with humor. This was the first phone call of them actually _being _together. He wanted to at least seem happier than he was. There was a nervous laugh on the opposite line.

"Zexy, I was wondering if you wanted to do something with me later…It feels really weird that I should be asking this but—"

"Don't say another word. I really want to spend some time with you and all that good stuff. My only issue is Sora." He glanced over at his friend. Sora faked a sniffle, pouting, with big eyes.

"I didn't know I was an issue…" The brunette's voice sounded baby-like. It pretty nearly frightened the silverette. Zexion raised a finger to his lips, smiling. His eyes pleaded with a happy look.

"Wait, is Sora there with you?"

"Err…Yeah…With all the junk happening to us you'd figure there had to be something else goin' on….Sora's currently sod of a mom booted him for a bit so he's staying at my place…" Zexion barely understood himself at this point.

"Um…Zexy….What's a sod?"

"Eh…Well if you look it up a British dictionary you'll find tons of stuff."

"British?"

"Yup, the Brits. Union Jack, chips and biscuits, all that good stuff." Sora, at this point, was giggling to the point of rolling on the floor at the conversation.

"Have you ever been to England?"

"Nah…But I really wanna go…"

"You are by _far _the weirdest person I've ever met, Zexy…" Zexion sighed as Sora stood, holding out his hand as if asking for the phone. "One sec, Dem…Sora wants to talk to you…"

"WAIT!" Demyx's shout caused the silverette to have to pull back from the phone a bit. The teen slowly put the receiver back to his ear.

"Yeah, Dem?" There was a pause.

"I love you…." Zexion didn't have a reply to this. His heart jumped, but he couldn't think of anything to say back. He inhaled deeply, and handed the phone to his brunette friend. This was a new feeling. Not of want or hope, but of need. He _needed _to see the blonde within the next few seconds or he was going to explode. There was a fluttering feeling in his stomach. _Is this what 'in love people' do? _He thought, desperately trying to make his heartbeat return to normal. He could barely hear Sora speaking to his love…This was an extremely unexpected feeling. It was like he had to pee, really, really, badly. He closed his eyes, trying to calm himself…Until unexpectedly, out of the blue, his chest began to hurt.

He knew this was not just from being nervous. With all that he'd learned from health classes—to just talking to people at school—this was beyond bad. He couldn't speak…just breathing hurt…

His legs started giving out. Eyes squeezing shut, his knees both touched the ground as he doubled over in pain. The silverette faintly heard Sora shout…

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The Most Worried Demyx POV

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Sora suddenly shouted the silverette's name. Up until this point Sora and he had been discussing whether or not it would be alright for the brunette to tag along without Zexion seeming rude to either party. The blond jumped at the loud sound.

"Huh!?! What is it???" He heard a thump and a groan.

"Zex just collapsed…I don't know what happened…I'm gonna get help…." There was a click then a beeping on the other end of the line. What just happened…?

Demyx glanced around his room. This was bad. Zexion was in trouble and he wasn't there…He jumped to his feet as quickly as possible, grabbing his coat from a chair he kept in the corner. In a matter of minutes, he was out the door running down the street. Zexion lived two miles away…If he maintained a fast speed he could get there in less than five minutes. So he ran…or sprinted, rather, toward his destination.

It only occurred to him after it happened that he was in a lot of pain, and that he should have looked where he was going. A man that looked an awful lot like his father hovered over him. He couldn't understand what the figure was saying.

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The Never Before Seen Sora POV

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The brunette's eyes had dark rings beneath them as he sat waiting in the emergency room. Directly after he had talked Zexion's father into taking his friend to the hospital, an ambulance came in, and on the stretcher it just so-happened to be Demyx…Bleeding. Bruised. Hurt. No one had told him what had happened to either of his friends…but he was refusing to leave until he was allowed to see one of them. His eyes were exhausted and dry from the tears that had instinctively rolled down his face since Zexion had fallen. The silverette seemed to be in a lot of pain when he collapsed, so the brunette was extremely worried. His hiccupped softly, sniffling, waiting.

He couldn't imagine life without the both of them.

He could visualize standing at the side of Zexion's hospital bed, where the nurses had told them both he was going to die…

The brunette would comment on it…

They'd have a short conversation, then the nurse would enter and order Sora to leave.

And he would tell Zexion that he would see him in Hell…

Then his friend would say: _I'll be waiting…_

All these thoughts were thoroughly depressing the usually-happy teen. Death terrified him almost as much as it did Zexion. This was officially the worst day of his known life. Both of his best friends could be dead… His chest spasmed with his shaky breaths. Pulling his knees up to his chin, he buried his face in his legs, sobbing quietly.

Suddenly someone touched his shoulder. Jerking back on impulse, he looked up only to have his eyes met by a brunette woman with his same color eyes. She smiled at him.

"Hi…My name is Aerith. Are you friends with a boy who has silver hair?" her voice was as gentle as her touch. Sora gazed at her for a moment, then nodded.

"Are you a nurse who's here to tell me he's gonna die?" his voice was completely devoid of hope. The woman seemed to notice. Shaking her head, she sat in the waiting chair next to his.

"My name is Aerith…And I'm an acquaintance of your friend…" she looked away for a moment. "I'm also good friends with his teachers Cloud Strife and Squall Leonhart…" Sora suddenly jumped, falling sideways off the chair. He stared at her. The brunette teen knew what both Zexion and Demyx had _said _to Cloud and Leon. Having her here might be an even worse omen.

Sora despised omens. The woman, Aerith, watched him worriedly. She reached out a hand toward him, only to have it batted away…

"No one is going to touch either of them, and Zex is _not _going to jail." He hissed at her. Seeming taken aback, she leaning into the chair.

"I'm not here to do any of those things…I'm just a friend who was drawn here by tragedy." Her eyes returned to the brunette's. "I got a call from a friend of mine who seems to know your Zexion as a friend. Larxene said she was concerned when she saw an ambulance going toward his home. She told me to come and see what was happening because she couldn't leave her work.

"I know we must sound like a few random strangers, but we care because we care. You know…I'm almost glad that you're one of the only ones in this waiting room. It made it easier to find you…" Sora glared at her. This woman was saying rude, but understanding things. He was debating whether or not to talk to her for comfort, or shun her for being cruel. Looking down, the teen decided the latter was too indecorous. He stood, and took his spot back next to Aerith. If he was alone, it did no good to push his one hope for warmth and comfort away just because she mentioned it had been easy to find the brunette.

After about a half-an-hour of talking to her, he ended up falling asleep in her arms.

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You are all disturbed and depressed beyond words, no?

YES!

I'm really sorry I had to do this stuff…

AND!

Yes, "What in love people do" is from a magical online cartoon called Meth Minute.

Woo.

See you guys soon! (Or not if I start school again.)


	14. Daddy

THIS CHAPTER IS BASED DIRECTLY THREE HOURS AFTER CHAPTER 13!

Sora has been sleeping and all that and Aeirth, with her maternal instinct, has been holding him and stuff.

We still don't know what happened to Demyx or Zexion…

BUT!

Let's find out, shall we?

Oh yeah, I apologize much for the last chapter to my lovely faithful fan person MinaMina….I didn't want them to be all happy….I'm sorryyyy ….

Zexion's pain is _my _pain!

I'm sorry Zexy…T-T

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Daddy

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(By the by, this is gonna be Zexion's)

It was cold…very cold…but the silverette could feel himself breathing. It didn't hurt as much anymore, but there continued to be a lingering pain surrounding his chest cavity. His eyes refused to open. He grunted softly with the effort of trying to move. Muscles being too weak to even move his fingers, he tried grunting louder. Maybe Sora was still talking to Demyx…He could hang up the phone and help. Exhaling, he realized his nose was making nothing but a whistle sound and he was unable to grunt.

Zexion's toes were numb.

There were footsteps…somewhere. He didn't understand what was going on. One muffled voice was followed by another. A click resounded in the area around him, as if a door were being opened.

"You can't stay for too long. His body is still under the effect of the drug we had to inject him with. The doctors are hoping he'll wake up soon enough, though." There was a shuffling and the voice got louder. The silverette could _feel _people in the room. "They say that the heart attack was caused by extreme stress…and apparently heart ailments might very well be genetic. I've just got to check his IV and a few other things, then I'll leave you two alone." Whoever was with the lady wasn't talking…could it be Demyx? He shivered softly, glad that his body still reacted to the cold that way. Zexion tried grunting again. The nurse's gasp then was happy. His eye was gently pried open. He looked around, but was unable to turn his head. The woman holding his eye had long black hair, and dark eyes. She was smiling at him.

"It seems like he's awake, but the drug probably haven't worn off yet. I don't think he's able to move." She looked at whoever else was in the room with her. Zexion exhaled as loudly as he could. He wanted her to tell him what had happened.

"Is he gonna be okay?" That was Sora's voice…only more desolate and hopeless. But, if that was Sora, where was Demyx? The nurse nodded to Sora's question.

"Give me a moment to explain a few things about the situation to him, then I'll leave you guys alone and be back in a bit."

"Yeah…okay…." The brunette's voice was beginning to scare Zexion. Something bad _must've _happened. The nurse's gaze returned back to the silverette as she released his eyelid. He was glad to find that his eye didn't just close. It stayed half-way open, at least.

"Zexion, hun…?" The teen grunted softly. "Dear, it seems you've had a heart attack. The doctors were actually commenting on how close you also were to a stroke. I don't know what kinda stress has been building up on you, but it's been terrible for your heart, and your mind. Form this day forward the doctors'll be prescribing you a daily blood-thinner to make sure your arteries don't go on the ritz again, and also they're signing you up for some counseling.

"Now, I know it must stink having to go to counseling and all that, but, I'm sure you're not in the mood to get another one of those arterial hemorrhages again. I'll be back in a bit to check on all your vitals and stuff, but for now, I'm gonna let you have some time with your friend." The silverette took a second to soak in the information. Heart attack? Was that what it was? _Oh God…counseling…_even with stress he wasn't in the mood to talk to some weird person who wanted to know all his dirty little secrets. He grunted…He wanted her to go away. He wanted Sora to tell him something nice. Most of all, he wanted to know if Demyx was here. Zexion wanted to see him. The door clicked again…the nurse lady was gone.

The brunette walked next to the hospital bed…The silverette could see him now.

"Zexion…You okay?" his voice was still quiet and unhappy. The bed ridden teen just stared in response. "I'm just glad you're alive right now…I overheard the people who work here talking to your mom…They were saying that I got you here just in time…Even a minute or so later and you could have died." Zexion would have asked where Demyx was at that point, but his mouth still wouldn't open. He couldn't bring himself to think of anything else. Death would suck if he could never see the blond again. Blinking wasn't an option, even if his eyes were hurting. Sora continued to be silent for a few moments. "About Demyx…"

The silverette panicked the moment those words passed his friend's lips. They were even miserable, distressing, and almost heartbreaking. Whatever breath he could manage increased. This sounded bad.

"I haven't heard any actual news about him…but…" Sora seemed to be choking back a sob. Zexion braced himself. "He was rushed into the same ER you were just a little after we got you here. I'm terrified for him." The silverette tried to scream, but all that came out was a muffled yowl of anguish. Demyx was hurt…. Pain flooded the teen's vision. _More hurt than I am…_ He was quite surprised, and slightly aggravated to find that his tear glands were anything but numb. Liquid clouded any world he knew.

And right then and there, he gave up. He stopped feeling, his mind at a pause. If his body wasn't forcing the motion, he would have stopped breathing. Even a heart stopping was nothing compared to the pain of knowing the one he loved might be in agony…Or worse. Dead. Hearing the brunette cry along with him was hindering his ability to stop weeping. He prayed to any God that existed.

_Don't let him be dead….and if he is….give whatever may be left of my life to him…_

"As soon as his room is open, I'm going to go visit him and figure out whatever I can… Hopefully they let you go soon so you can see for yourself…." Sora's voice seemed to echo and resound everywhere. Zexion's world went black.

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Four hours, seven minutes, and 12 seconds later…

(By the by, this is Demyx's)

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He couldn't move. Vomit felt like it was surfacing…But his body wouldn't let it come out. Wherever he was, it smelled like plastic. The blond set all his available energy on trying to open his eyes. Maybe he could convince that man who had tried to talk to him to give him a ride to Zexion's house. Even if it had been less than a day since he admitted his feelings to the silverette, he could at least be there for him in his time of need.

Collapsing could only mean so many things.

Almost passing out with the effort, his eyes slowly revealed themselves to a nearly blinding light. Glancing around he saw the makings of the average hospital room.

_Oh God…_ he thought softly, _So _that's _what happened…_ He looked down at himself. There was quite the contraption built around his waist. Demyx tried groaning, only to find himself in pain just at breathing. Assuming his back or spine were somehow damaged, he attempted blinking and staying completely still. The memory of his anatomy classes were enough to give him the common sense _not _to become panicked in this kind of situation. Movement could cause permanent damage, and that would royally suck. He glanced around again. The room seemed to have been unoccupied since his arrival. That meant no visitor, which meant either:

The doctors didn't know he was awake,

They weren't allowing visitors because his injuries were extremely severe.

Nobody _cared _enough to visit.

The third option was slightly unrealistic. Even if Zexion were hurt, Sora would definitely come to visit….unless the silverette had died.

Just the thought of Zexion's death was enough to bring a tear to the blonde's eyes. Life without his love was unimaginable. He blinked away the liquid. _GOTTA BE POSITIVE, Demyx! _He shouted at himself mentally. Thinking that way would only make it hard for both of them to get better.

Besides that, there wasn't anything the blond could really do.

So he waited. Eventually, blinking got easier, so he did it more often.

So far this had been a very strange day.

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SORRY I HAVE TO END IT HERE!!!

I'm really cold and really tired….It seems to be somewhere between 2 AM and 4 AM where I live, so everyone in my family is asleep.

Also, it's really lonely to sit here writing about a wounded Zexy and Dem listening to love songs by Hellogoodbye.

Since it's my winter break, I'll be trying to fit in as much storyline as I can before I go back to school.

I've got a lot to do though, so hopefully we'll at least see chapter fifteen by the fifth.

Love you guys!

Remember- Pressure means faster!

Also, I'm really sorry to those of you whom I haven't replied to your reviews.

My internet is terrible and it doesn't tell me when I get them, or it doesn't send them. I'm sorry…


	15. Joke

Returning to the fifteenth chapter…

I never thought we'd get this far…

Oh yeah, thank you guys for all the pressure! (AKA Reviews and stuff)

I really appreciate it, even if it does take hours to reply because of slow internet…^-^

I am so sorry it's taken me this long to update, but suddenly school became incredibly hard, I had some seriously BAD personal issues, I went through an emotional breakdown, and I lost most of the files on my computer.

I promise to make this one worth the wait.

Thanks for staying with me ^^;

…

Joke

…

"You're not _serious, _are you?" Sora's voice woke Demyx from his gentle nap that he had beguiled himself into. There were footsteps, and the swish of pants. The blond forced his eyes open to tell his friend he was awake. There was a nurse, and the brunette, standing at the foot of his bed. Sora looked sad, and very tired. The blond tried opening his mouth again, but failed, as he was still exhausted. "You're telling me that Demyx's own father hit him with a _car_?" The nurse nodded at Sora's disbelief.

"It's not really all that uncommon in these parts to be hit by one... it's just the irony of who it was that hit him. Don't worry, he'll be fine." She tried to soothe him with her voice. Sora shook his head.

"But you said _spinal fractures_. That can't be good." He protested. She smiled softly at him.

"It beats a broken back." She argued. The brunette sighed, glancing at Demyx. The blond blinked a few times to signal that he had heard the entire conversation. Grinning, Sora raced to the side of the bed where he firmly grasped the other teen's hand. His eyes seemed brighter than Demyx had expected. That must mean something good…or at least better than he was expecting. The nurse, sighing, nodded to the brunette. "I'll be back in a few. You can't stay long because we don't want you wearing him out." She turned, walking out of the room, and lightly closing the door. Sora's eyes met the blonde's again.

"Hey, Dem… I'm glad you're feeling at least a _little _alright." His tone of voice wasn't very uplifting… The blond tried smiling, but didn't get very far before his face muscles made him drop his face again. The teachers from elementary school had all lied to him. It took more muscles to smile than it did to frown. If it were any other way he wouldn't be looking sad right now. But then again, maybe it was better than looking happy. Major injuries were never funny. "Umm… Remember how Zexion collapsed while we were making plans and stuff?" Demyx didn't like where this was going. Comfort, feigned happiness, Zexion's accident. He sighed through his nose. A tingling sensation went up he back as he imagined what might have happened. "Well…He's okay…He wanted to make sure I told you that…" The blond wanted to laugh, to jump up and hug Sora. As long as the silverette was okay he knew that it was perfectly alright to hope. The blond exhaled sharply as he opened his mouth very slightly.

"So…ra…." He rasped quietly, his lungs aching, "Th…ank…..you…." Pain overtook him, he wished he could wince. The brunette continued holding his friend's hand gently. Demyx suddenly felt a warm sensation…little droplets on his hand. Sora was crying. The thought of crying along with him was strong, but not fervent enough to make tears escape his own eyes. As long as they all survived through this, everything would be alright. At least he hoped as much.

….

1 Week Later…

…..

Zexion could stand on his own—that was an accomplishment in itself. The brunette eyed him warily.

"Are you sure it's okay for you to do that so early? That medication really messes with your balance…" his voice was coated with feigned worry. The silverette had the urge to scoff. Instead, he shrugged.

"Oh come _on, _Sora. You know me," he tried his hardest to sound confident; "I am the most stubborn COW you've ever met. The nurse told me that until I could at least walk on my own, I'm not allowed to see Demyx." Holding out his arms for balance, he attempted taking a step. Wobbling a bit as he tried lifting his leg, he grasped the hospital wall. "Alrighty, obviously I can't do that yet. But at least I know I can keep my balance." He sighed easing himself into the chair near the bed. The brunette smiled at him.

"Zex, I'm sure Dem with be fine. Right now your heart isn't strong enough for you to be exerting such force. Pleeease don't ware yourself out." Laughing slightly, the silverette shook his head.

"Sora, I'm already exhausted. Those stupid nurses made me stay in bed for the first four days, and the past three days, I've barely been able to stand…." He sighed, gazing at his friend. "I'm tired Sora. I'm just so tired." A tear fell. Bringing a hand up to his face he began to wipe it away, just as more began to fall…After all the things they'd both gone through, after what the silverette had put his love through, he still loved the blonde, and loved in return. If it was an impossible feat, he would walk and recover if only for Demyx. There was nothing more important than that. The more tears fell, the more confident he felt.

For every tear, it was like a sin had been forgiven.

Warily pulling him into a gentle hug, Sora smiled. He ran his fingers through the silverette's hair a few times.

"Zex, it will be okay. You're alright, Demyx is alright. You just have to stop being such a dweeb and focus." His voice became brighter, "It's not like I haven't been copying notes for you in class either. You owe me big time for that." Zexion laughed loudly and suddenly. The brunette glanced down to see a large grin on the face of his friend. Laughter through tears warmed the hearts of both boys.

"Sora…can we stay like this forever? I mean, us being close, and you being a complete knuckle head?" He blinked away a last tear. Sora giggled.

"And you being a total girl? Sure. I think I can live with that." Rubbing his seemingly perfect, spiky hair, he looked down at the ground. "Zex, I was thinking…" The silverette looked at him seriously.

"Why are you acting like this is a confession? I never realized it was a bad thing to think…" He eyed his friend curiously. Smiling slightly, the brunette looked back at the other teen. His eyes were sad. Almost frighteningly so.

"What happens if Demyx doesn't ever walk again? We all know you will…" His voice became quiet, "But Demyx had serious damage done to his spine. What happens if he never gets better?" The silverette looked away. That was a good question, but "what if's" were never good for being positive. If Demyx would never walk again, the blonde's heart would be broken. No more jumping, or glomping, or running and skipping happily. It was bound to hurt both of them if it did happen. Nothing would be the same when it came to being physical, but…

If the time ever came, Zexion was ready.

He loved the blonde enough not to care—because he honestly never wanted to touch him forcefully ever again. He had made the decision far earlier when Demyx had finally answered that he did, indeed, want to be with the silverette. If they ever had sex again, Demyx would be on top, because Zexion didn't want him to hurt anymore than he already had. Shaking his head briskly he turned back to Sora who was waiting patiently for an answer.

"If Dem never walks again then I will carry him everywhere he needs to go. I will be the legs he doesn't have." His voice was filled with enough pride that the brunette started thinking his friend was going back to his old self again. The old, happier Zexion who believed he could take on anything. Sora grinned again, walking toward his friend and grabbing his shoulder. The silverette smiled at the other teen.

"Zex, I'm going to go see him really quick. Don't try to walk again till I get back, kay?" he squeezed his friend's shoulder gently when he nodded. The brunette left briskly, even though he had an aura of slowness about him. Zexion watched him leave, then laid back on the hospital bed, gazing at the white painted stone of the ceiling. Every little bump of texture in the walls was an existence easier than his own. Thousands of millions of tiny atoms that could each be little worlds.

Sighing quietly, he began to think…

There could be so many worse things that could have happened, and his problem was one of so many in this world. It wasn't unusual for him to think that his meant the whole world, though. Demyx was his whole world. It had become that way nearly the moment he had fallen for the blonde. So while every other creature skittered about thinking of other things, the silverette felt it was his responsibility to take care of his lover. They would grow up someday, and Zexion was determined at this point to support the blonde no matter what.

A sudden knock at the door suddenly make him jump slightly. He glanced at the door, hesitant about answering. There was no way he could walk over to see who it was, making it difficult to decide whether or not the situation was safe. Sighing softly, he smacked himself mentally. As if it were somehow dangerous to open up a door in a hospital. This wasn't a horror movie. He chuckled softly at himself.

"Who is it?" he asked just loud enough that he was sure whoever was on the other side of the door could hear. The door clicked open suddenly, without any answers from the other side. Zexion's eyes widened and he shielded his face.

…

Sora's Side

…..

Sora entered through the hospital door slowly, making sure he wasn't waking his friend. To his surprise the blonde was looking out the window near his bed, and his eyes were filled with happiness. The brunette eyed his friend, slightly afraid to raise his voice and make his friend lose his happiness. He heard a small sigh, as Demyx turned his head toward his visitor. There was the slightest twitch at the blonde's mouth that told Sora he was about to speak. Sora decided being weak and tired was probably the worst experience his friend had ever gone through.

"The tree swayed solemnly as a desolate wind caused its weak and dying branches to creak." The blond sounded so very rehearsed it was nearly scary. His very voice in itself was eerie, and Sora felt a pang in his heart. Demyx seemed to be turning a bit… Emo. The one thing the brunette had never expected of his friend. It was almost humorous.

"Ummmm…." Sora tested the sudden silence with a question. "Dem, what in the world are you talking about? That is the single most emo thing I have ever heard you say." Coming out and saying it in a direct approach seemed the best plan. His friend's face turned dark. It had never occurred to the boy that Demyx was capable of being angry, or spiteful. It was scary. However, the blond turned away again and sighed, instead of acting on any of the anger he seemed to be feeling for the statement. It was almost unusual, but Sora had always taken Demyx to be a pacifist. "Dem… Seriously. Please talk to me." The blond groaned loudly, something the nurses told Sora would have been every difficult for his friend at the time. He twisted his neck back to the brunette.

"Sora… Did Zexion ever tell you why I refused him at first…?" He paused, blinking slowly, "aside from his taking me without consent?" His eyes were full of pain. The type of pain his friend hadn't seen since that particular incident. Moving closer to where his friend lay, he crouched by the hospital bed gazing into the blonde's eyes.

"The Christian thing, right? You recited a bible verse that broke his heart." Sora scanned Demyx's features for a sign of veracity. He looked as though he was about to cry.

"Sora, what if this wasn't just an accident?" he inhaled slowly, pausing, closing his eyes. "I think God is punishing me for this. For giving myself to temptation." The brunette stood sharply, fighting the urge to hit his friend. Hissing softly, he glared down at the blonde, recognizing confusion. Sora was not going to show any mercy to that statement.

"Demyx," he snarled, crossing his arms, eyes pained, "that is the most hateful and cruel thing I have ever heard you say. Do you really think that God would try to kill you for falling in love?" His nose twitched as he fought back his anger. "If anything you just said were true, I and Riku would have been forced from each other ages ago. If you're going to be cowardly about your relationship with Zexion…" He turned away from the blonde, not wanting to see his aggrieved expression. "If you're not going to be serious about him, and how much he loves you—how much he's fighting for you—then tell me now. I don't want him recovering to see you again, just to kill himself later." Sora looked back momentarily, a solemn expression falling over his countenance. "Zexion is a wonderful person who has gone through a lot in his life. I don't want him gone just because you're afraid to want him. If you mean what you just said, I want you to stay away from him." Turning the handle of the door, the boy sighed loudly. "I will do every my power to keep you away if you plan on hurting him."

…

"OHMYGAWD ZEXY I MISSED YOU!" Mirai's voice made Zexion's teeth buzz slightly. Aerith stood by the door, smiling softly.

"Zexion, I invited Larxene to come visit. This girl was just so excited to see you that I couldn't control her." The older woman's smile comforted the teen greatly. He smiled at his friends, then scowled playfully at Mirai.

"Mirai," he rasped, trying to control his joy, "please calm down. Exciting me isn't the greatest thing in the world to do right now." The girl grinned, sitting at the foot of his bed. Bouncing up and down a few times, she giggled clapping her hands.

"Zexy-kins, I was just so worrrrieeeed. And the nurses wouldn't let me see Demy-kins. They said I was too excited." She shrugged, beaming. "How has recovery been going?" The silver-haired boy gave her a smirk and a chuckle.

"Recovery is a hard road. They don't even give you free ice cream unless you're having something down with your mouth," he made an over-exaggerated gagging motion. "I can barely eat most solid foods. The doctors think that if I do, it might thicken my blood too much. It's mostly just nasty health-food smoothies and a vegan diet." He smiled softly at Aerith, who had been remaining by the door. "Aside from that, how have you few been doing? Sora hasn't left since me and Dem got here, so we haven't exactly been informed on the outside world." The brunette woman smiled walking closer, taking a seat in the chair next to the bed.

"To be completely honest, I don't get out much. Cloud and Leon have been doing well. I didn't tell them that you ever shopped at my store, but they actually seem to talk about the two of you a lot. They don't know what happened to Demyx, but apparently your heart attack is common news." Zexion looked from Aerith to Mirai. He nodded his head at the girl signaling her opinion.

"Well, Zexy, the guys are really worried about you," the girl explained, "None of the teachers really talk about it, though. Riku and Roxas have been freaking out big time because they only get the occasional calls from Sora and his mom hasn't really been telling people where he is." She paused, pulling at a loose thread on her shirt. "No one but Riku and maybe three other people know what happened to Demyx. Aerith is right, though. The fact that you had a heart attack is no secret. Mr. Valentine blamed it on you having a poor diet or something like that, but we all know that's complete bullshit." Zexion nodded, sighing.

"I'm glad no one knows what really happened to Dem. If they did, I can only imagine how many of them would be piling into his room and crowding him with questions and stress." The teen looked down, inhaling loudly through his nose. "I still can't believe he might never walk again." Mirai nodded, taking the boy's hand.

"I know, Zexy, I know," she soothed calmly. "But I know you. You'd be there for him forever. Then you can be the cutest co-dependant couple ever." Zexion fought back a laugh.

"Mirai, dear, do you know what co-dependant even—"his thought was suddenly cut off by the door being slammed shut by the extremely aggravated form of Sora. He gazed at the three people in the room, tears in his eyes. Zexion sat up sharply, fear overwhelming him. "Oh my god, Sora, what happened?" He wanted to stand, but was lightheaded—almost to the point in which he had almost passed out from just sitting. The brunette walked closer to the bed, looking his friend straight in the eyes.

"Demyx thinks God is punishing him for loving you." His voice was almost devoid of emotion, save the tiny sliver of anger still remaining. Zexion stared at Sora in disbelief. There was no way Demyx could ever think that… Demyx was the one that…

"Sora, are you sure that's what he meant? Did you hear him right?" Zexion inspected his friend's face, half hoping that he was joking, but knowing deep in his heart that Sora would never lie to him. The brunette's ocean-blue eyes simply gazed into his friend's. Mirai gazed at both of them, clearing her throat slightly, testing the waters of silence.

"Guys…. You _do _know that Demyx is extremely Catholic, right?" She paused when they both turned and stared at her. Zexion's confused expression prompted her to continue, despite Sora's glare. "He grew up alone in and since he was little he believed God was the only one who loved him. It's a wonder in itself that he ever opened up to either of you like he did. It took me years to even get him to say that he liked me." She looked away form both of them, toward the door, then back. "It's going to take a while for him to accept that what happened was an accident and that God isn't picking on him for being gay." The silver-haired teen looked away from his friends, back out the window.

"I though that he was Christian. Not Catholic." Mirai shrugged.

"Mostly the same thing. Catholic is stricter." She explained. Zexion glanced at her again. He shook his head slightly.

"How long have you two even known each other? He was talking about _marrying _you." His eye betrayed certain hopelessness at the whole situation that Sora saw immediately. The brunette ran his hand through his friend's hair and shook his head slightly. Mirai ignored the action and sighed.

"I've known him since we were really little. I met him when we were around 7, and I used to go to church with him." The boys looked at each other for a moment, a small tear forming at the corner of Zexion's eyes. He sniffled, lying back on the bed. Turning away from them, the sound of his sobbing echoed through the small room. Sora kneeled at the side of the bed, waiting patiently for his friend to seek comfort. Aerith watched painfully, placing a hand on the younger boy's shoulder. The silverette's sniffles made way for an almost inaudible cry.

"…. I did all of those things to him… And he was so hurt by it… I never even knew…" His sobbing recommenced, his friends unable to do anything but watch.

…..

I apologize for all the religious aspects of this chapter…

It just made sense at the time and it adds a twist to the story.

Once again—I cannot apologize enough for not updating for so long… It's been almost two years, and I'm super-mega-grateful if you're still with me.


	16. Issues

Hello. It's been a long two years of not updating, and I am honestly very sorry. I pretty much haven't touched this thing in about 4 years, huh… A lot of things have happened in the past two years. Hopefully this fanfic will "grow-up" a little (I guess) in the sense that I'm going to write this next chapter with all seriousness and emotional experience. If there are some weird dis-continuities, I'm very sorry and that would probably be because I haven't read it in almost as long as I haven't written it.  
I would, however, like to thank everyone who still reads this. I love you guys.

Zexion's POV:

Zexion stood near the door to Demyx's room. He sighed repeatedly, wondering whether or not he should follow Sora's advice. _Stay away from him. _Biting his lip, he slid down to a sitting position. Nurses and doctors walked by, a few glancing down at him. He closed his eyes and buried his face in his knees. It wasn't just the fact that he had raped his friend, or that they were dating. Sora wanted him away because Demyx wanted him away. Zexion didn't know how to handle that yet. Even after he had committed the crime, Demyx hadn't cared if he was still around. Aside from the elbow to the stomach, it hadn't been much more than a matter of minutes before they began speaking again. He wasn't ready to imagine a life without the boy. He played with his socks while fighting with the decision of whether or not to enter the room. His scrubs rubbed against his hands in an odd fashion, making him feel an uncomfortable shiver, like when rubbing his fingers the wrong way on a "holographic" picture. There wasn't much he could even think of to say. If he couldn't say anything, he was completely unsure whether it was even worth it to go into his boyfriend's room, just to see him in pain. Not only physically, but emotionally—and the emotional pain would probably rise exponentially if Zexion did choose to enter the room. Placing his hand over his heart he held his breath for a moment. His doctors were idiots. What they had diagnosed to be a heart attack was really just Takotsubo cardiomyopathy, broken heart syndrome. His heart was just so weak from all the anxiety that it decided it didn't want to pump normally anymore. A small tear escaped his eye. He hated himself for putting his love through so much pain, but knew that he either had to end their relationship or mend it or his mind and body wouldn't last very long. He'd never had a history of self-harm, but he had also never thought of it so much as now.

He didn't want to hurt himself or anyone else but he knew that Demyx probably had his mind made up. "God" was "punishing" him for having a heart. Zexion honestly didn't know whether or not he could be with someone who genuinely believed that. It wasn't that the silverette wasn't religious, or that he thought that what Demyx believed was wrong or false by any means—he just felt that I the blond really, truly believed that, it would be better for both of them to simply separate. Demyx wouldn't have a plagued conscience about his feelings, and the two could just move on. Zexion knew he might have a little trouble with this, but he also knew that as long as Demyx was happier, then he was willing to sacrifice anything. There were sudden footsteps closer to him and he felt somewhat of a shadow overhead. He lifted his head to reveal Sora standing about him.

"Zex… You okay?" his voice wavered a little, but only enough that his worry was noticeable. Zexion sighed loudly, stretching his arms out in front of himself.

"I don't think I'm going to go in. I've made enough mistakes to know…" he paused as Sora kneeled beside him, "…to know that I need to give this time or else I'm going to make a bad decision. Like when I tried to tell him I loved him the first time." Sora put a hand on his friend's shoulder and rubbed it slightly. Neither stood, nor did they break eye contact.

"Mirai left as well as Aerith. Larxene never showed, but Aerith seemed like she had hope." Sora stood, holding out a hand to his friend, "let's go get some food from the cafeteria and then we can think about coming back later, okay?" Zexion grabbed his friend's hand and pushed himself off the ground. If they couldn't think of something by the end of lunch, he figured, they might as well talk to the doctors about discharge. His parents couldn't afford to keep him there forever. The two walked down the corridors and navigated their way to the hospital cafeteria. They got in line and continued to talk.

"So uhm. You buying?" Zexion asked as they made their way through the line.

"Yeah. Get whatever. Just don't max me out, okay?"

"So, like. How do you think all of this is going to work out in the end?"

"All of what?"

"Me and Dem. I figure there's really only two options at this point."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, we either break up or stay together."

"Hm. Well. I dunno, dude. I personally think there's more than just two answers to everything. Almost nothing is just black and white. Unless, of course, you're in HL Bio or math…" Sora paid the women behind the counter and the two took a seat at one of the small, 2-seated tables. The brunette poked at his food with a fork and continued, "there's always more than just those two. What if you guys just like, took a break or something? Wouldn't that work?" Zexion shook his head, taking a drink from his lemonade.

"Not at this point in time. I don't really know, though. At this point I kind of don't give a fuck. I'm going to end up miserable either way."

"But, Zex, there's a certain degree of giving a fuck that goes into not giving a fuck. By saying you don't care if the world falls apart, in some small way you're saying you want it to stay together, on your terms. You want to do this and you want to be the one to make the decision so that there isn't any surprise when the verdict comes." Sora glared his friend straight in the face, "I don't want you to make some fucked up decision just cause you feel like you have to. For all you know, Demyx will get over it and you could've ended the relationship before that had a chance to happen." Zexion smirked, taking a bite of his food. He was getting vaguely tired of all of this. He just wanted to figure things out and be done with it. No bullshit, no fighting, no fear. Just neutral. He rested his head in his hand and placed his elbow on the table.

"I just want to make a decision so that I don't drag this out any longer. The longer that I'm in a relationship with him, the more I want to keep it that way. If I go in and talk to him, I want to at least have enough faith in myself to know I'll end it if I think it's necessary. This is getting crazy as it is." Sora nodded in agreement, chewing quickly.

"The last thing you need, though, is to end it if it ISN'T necessary. What if he's already regretting what he told me? You really never know." Zexion sighed and nodded as well.

"I don't think it's physically possible for anyone to know what another person is thinking. I don't even care anymore, though. I just want to have it in me to say no if it gets that far. I've never wanted to just be done with this kind of emotional pain so badly. If he doesn't want me, he doesn't want me. A cat is a cat is a cat. It's just the way things are." He twisted his food with his fork before putting it in his mouth and sucking on it. There wasn't much else left for him to say. He needed to be able to say no. He needed to be able to just turn away from this even if it hurt. There had never been anything in his life with as clear of an answer as this. If it's going to hurt them both to stay together, why do it? He didn't know if Sora had ever been faced with that sort of dilemma, though. There wasn't much advice he could get from his friend if his friend couldn't at least relate to the situation, was there? Anything could happen, but he wanted to prepare for the worst and hope for the best. It was all he could think of to do.

"Everything is just the way it is. You can't use that argument. But if it's really what you think is best, then fine. I still think you should give it a little more time, though. None of us have talked to Dem since I told him I was going to keep you two separate. And unless you really know that you want to do this, I'm going to do exactly what I said." Zexion noted that Sora's teeth made an unusual popping sound when he spoke while chewing. It was almost amusing, but he fought the urge to laugh. He mentally scolded himself, and reminded himself that he needed to talk to a psychiatrist as soon as possible to curb his weird mood swings. He didn't like the thought of medication, but he had no desire to have weird moment where he wanted to smile and laugh during extremely depressing or serious events. It was getting a bit old. He bit his lip and inhaled through his nose, sighing once more.

"Anyway, after we're done we need to talk to Mareno about discharge. I really kind of don't think I need to be here anymore. I'm ready to leave." He finished his lemonade and pushed his plate aside. "I want to go home and sleep without people waking me up every morning to see if I'm still alive and without the constant hustle of people and beeping from ECGs. I want to go back to school and call Cloud and Leon fuckers and knee Kairi in the crotch. I just want to go back to life." His friend eyed his cautiously, then sighed and rolled his eyes.

"A. Kairi doesn't have anything to knee, B. Life will never go back to normal. If you ever have such extreme anxiety again, you could die. And if you're not careful, you'll end up constantly beating yourself up about Demyx and getting yourself in that situation either way. I miss things being normal, too, but we both know there's no way to go back." He paused and sighed, "there's no way to just make things the way they were again. There are so many things I wish I could just go back and fix and have things be good again, but life isn't like that. No matter how much I want it to be. Or how much you want it to be."

Zexion knew Sora was right and was surprised by his wisdom. He had known the boy for years and never heard him speak so seriously and with such conviction. He was almost proud, but more astounded than anything. He waited for his friend to finish his food before standing up and throwing away his paper plate and cup. He looked around the room at all the doctors and other patients who were also eating. His problems felt almost small compared to a lot of the other patients. People who needed heart and liver transplants and people who were getting limbs amputated all seemed to somehow have more strength than him. He felt almost pathetic for his own problems. Stupid teenage problems, he thought to himself.. Just a bunch of stupid teenage problems. Sora stood, also throwing out his trash, and took his friend by the arm, leading him out of the room. They walked in silence as till they reached Zexion's room. The bed inside was uncomfortable, but enough to fall asleep on. Neither of Zexion's parents had visited since he was admitted, so nothing was in the room except the basic hospital layout; bed, thin sheets, window, ECG, a sink, and a trash can. The bathroom was even across the hall, so when Zexion had been bedridden Sora had been forced to help him with bedpans. He'd be forever grateful for that even if the brunette had insisted it was "no problem." Of course it was a problem. He sat down on the hospital bed and Sora joined him. The two both swung their legs over and the brunette leaned over a little onto Zexion's shoulder.

"Sora… What do you think it would be like if Riku left you…?" Zexion's question was earnest, and he tried to be as gentle with it as possible. Riku and Sora had had quite a few problems in their relationship in the past and he knew it was a vaguely tender area.

"I don't have to think. I know." Sora spoke quietly, almost as if he had been intending to reveal something to his friend for a while. Zexion eyed him carefully, remaining silent for a few moments, but unable to maintain.

".. What do you mean..?"

Sora's face changed suddenly, into both pain, but also anger. "Me and Riku got into a fight a few days after you were hospitalized."

"What happened..?"

There was a long pause before Sora let out a shaky sigh. "He got mad at me for spending all my time with you here. He accused me of… a lot of things…" his voice was quiet, but Zexion could see is shoulders and lips quivering. "And..and…" suddenly his voice got louder, and almost in a snarl, "He's just such a fucking cocky bastard and he's been doing this to me for months." Sora stopped, tears escaping his now angry eyes. "It was never, 'I'm so glad to see you, Sora, I love you, Sora.' No. It always had to be 'Oh, you were over at Zexion's house AGAIN, you must be cheating on me. God, Sora, you're so stupid, I never should have left Kairi.' Over and over and over and I'm just…" his voice returned to its quiet state, anger dissipating, "I was just done. And we're done. And I've got to be honest, I miss him so fucking much I can't stand it, but I can't let him do that to me anymore. Never again." They sat in silence for a few more minutes, Zexion unable to think of anything to say. His two friends had been together for years, he had never even been hinted that it was abusive or anything of the sort. This was a new side of Sora that he couldn't remember ever seeing before. Speechless and amazed, the silverette couldn't think of anything more to do than put his arm around his friend. Sora leaned into him more, crying softly.

Zexion didn't like it when Sora cried. In fact, it seemed to strike him more than when Demyx did. He took his friend in both his arms and simply rocked him back and forth. He laid his head on the brunette's and held him. He couldn't think of anything else to do. He felt awful that this had even happened and he hadn't known about it. If he had, he wouldn't have been so insensitive to just ask a question like that. It was just cruel… Sora sniffled and pushed against Zexion's chest a little, raising his head to look at his friend's face. The brunette lifted his arms and looped them around Zexion's neck, only without hugging him. His face was covered in tears and his eyes were red, but he smiled softly.

"Zexion, you're the most wonderful person I've ever met, you know that?" He pressed his forehead against the silverette's. "You're just wonderful, and you're beautiful and sweet and I will never understand why people don't treat you with the respect you deserve." Zexion was afraid to move. He didn't want to upset his friend more, but they had never been in this position before. He felt like it was very intimate… He knew that he and Sora and pressed their forehead's together before, and they'd certainly hugged while crying, but to mix the two felt oddly… loving. Loving in a different way than the silverette expected from his friend. He waited patiently to see if Sora was going to continue. "Zex, I… I just. I never ever want you hurt. By Demyx or anybody. You're just… you're so beautiful." Zexion didn't know how to respond, but he also felt vaguely comfortable. Like this was something that was meant to happen. Just the closeness and the understanding.

"… I don't know what to say," the silverette muttered, gazing into his friend's eyes. "I just—"

Sora's lips met his very suddenly. His teeth knocked into Zexion's lip, making him squeal slightly, but the kiss itself.. didn't feel wrong. It wasn't like when he kissed Demyx, though. It felt good, but he felt slightly guilty as well. He closed his eyes, not able to break himself away, and he kissed his friend back. He moved his lips against Sora's, taking each of them into his own, and breathing deeply through his nose. He pulled the brunette closer, moving his hands to Sora's waist, and pressing his lips against the other's slightly harder. Sora was the one to break the kiss, as he touched the silverette's face gently, tracing his fingers along the other's jaw.

"You're just so beautiful, Zexion. Everything about you." He nuzzled his nose against his friend's. "I didn't lie when I said I wished you were my boyfriend. If it weren't for Demyx through this, I would have taken you for myself the moment I got Riku to leave." Zexion looked into his friend's blue eyes, confusion gone. Sora was in love with him, and he had never noticed. However, he still loved Demyx. A lot. With extreme passion. He released Sora suddenly, the brunette sliding his arms away from his friend's neck. Zexion looked at the floor with a pained expression. He didn't want to leave Demyx, but he didn't want to tell Sora that he didn't want him. He did want Sora. And the kiss had enforced that.

The silverette stood suddenly without looking at his friend. "I have to go to the restroom. I'll be right back." He didn't look back as he left the room. As he closed the door, he rushed to the bathroom down the hall, and shut the door quickly, locking it, and leaning against it. Letting out a sigh, he slid to the floor with his back against the door. "I love you, Demyx." He tested the words out loud. They still felt right. "I love you… Sora." Confusion swept over him. Those words felt just as right, if not more right. It didn't make any sense to him at all. Demyx was the one who got hit by a car for him, who gave up worlds for him, who made him crazy in every way shape and form…. But… Sora was the one who was always there for him. The one who always made him smile and never judged him. Sora was his best friend, and Demyx was someone he met by accident in the high school infirmary.

Nothing made sense, and he didn't know whether or not anything should. He sighed repeatedly, and began taking in deep, slow breaths, attempting to calm himself.

"I just kissed my best friend and it felt right. It felt like it was meant to happen." He said out loud to himself. He felt pathetic again. "I could have anyone in the world, and I had to make the choice between those two.." he giggled to himself, then buried his face in his knees again. He hated himself.

There was a choice to be made and he didn't know the answer. He had been so quick to assume it was the easy way out to leave Demyx, and he had made the mistake of telling Sora. And now he was trapped.

Thank you everyone, and I hope to see you again soon. If I don't post a chapter within the next few months, I apologize in advance.


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